Hanger (Review)

Hanger Hanger (2009)Directed by Ryan NicholsonWell Hanger is a movie that alot of our female horror bloggers are NOT going to watch and certainly not review.Sometimes horror is still a boys club.There is still a part of the horrorsphere that is still extreme,vulgar, disgusting and nasty. Movies that throwback exploitation and grindhouse and make it tampon fuckin bloody. This isn't your sanitized Tarantino/Rodriguez shit. This is over the top fucked...

Categories: 2009 exploitation movies, 2009 grindhouse movies, gutterballs, gutterballs review, hanger, hanger trailer

Thanksgiving means killing poultry! (Poultrygeist's Musical Numbers)

Thanksgiving means killing poultry! Poor little chickens and turkeys dying for your gluttonous stomachs. You bastards! Makes you want to be a vegetarian right? WRONG!Turkey is just too damn yummy.But if you watched Troma's Poultrygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead you'd think twice about reaching for that drumstick. The jaded viewer is going on hiatus for the Thanksgiving break but the least I can do is leave you some ha ha's while I'm gone. Poultrygeist...

Categories: happy thanksgiving, jadedviewer, jadedviewer.com, poultrygeist muscial scenes, Poultrygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead, thanksgiving trailer, the jaded viewer, troma films

Universal Soldier: Regeneration (Trailer)

Doesn't that poster make you wanna kick some ass?I wouldn't be the jaded viewer if I didn't inform (ahem force) you to know what was the latest movie of our beloved hero Jean Claude Van Damme. I told you about Karate, I told you about The Eagle Path and now we unleash the trailer for Universal Soldier 3: Regeneration!Dolph Lundgren and UFC champ Andrei "The Pit Bull" Arlovski are tag team UniSoldiers against the one and only JCVD. Are you psyched?...

Categories: bloodsport, chong li, JCVD, Jean Claude Van Damme, kumite brackets, the eagle path, the eagle path trailer, universal soldier 3, universal soldier regeneration trailer, van damme

Ink (Review)

InkInk (2009)Directed by Jamin WinansTerry Gilliam and David Lynch would be impressed by Ink.In the world of indie cinema, most films go into generic period pieces of romantic dramedies. Rarely do you see a film that boldly attempts to be ambitiously creative and visually stimulating. It's always the big studios that go ga ga and make movies with CGI porn and non existent plots.But Jamin Winan's Ink is a movie that defies the stereotype of independent...

Categories: independent cinema, ink, ink torrent, ink trailer, Jamin Winans, pan's labyrinth

Vampire Rules 101 (or Vampire Self Defense for Beginners)

I've never seen Twilight and I have no intention of ever seeing this twat-tard of a trilogy. But I do have a fascination of the mythos of vampire lore. I'm not talking about ancient Lestaty type crap but the fact that popular culture (be it books, TV, film and the Interwebs) have given a bunch of rules for vampires to have to deal with.Insano Steve hates any monsters or supernatural beings that are hindered by rules that prevent them from eating,...

Categories: buffy the vampire slayer, let the right one in, twilight, vampire kids, vampires

The Canyon (Review)

The Canyon The Canyon (2009)Directed by Richard HarrahRemember when the Brady Bunch went to visit the Grand Canyon? Wow what an adventure that was. A ghost town, a gold digger, little indian boy in trouble. What a family vacation!Well, this is totally the opposite.Lori (Yvonne Strahovski) and Nick (Eion Bailey) are your stereotypical newlyweds who instead of going to Hawaii and getting stalked by killers or going to Mexico to check out some ruins...

Categories: 2009 horror dvd, 2009 horror movies, 2009 horror trailers, the canyon

Wapakman (Official Trailer)

I don't know how I missed this debut trailer of Wapakman after being overcome with Manny "Pacman" Pacquiao hype over the last few days. But after seeing him demolish Miguel Cotto on Saturday night and retaining the prestige as the best pound for pound boxer in the world, after watching 4 24/7 episodes on HBO and hearing him sing on Jimmy Kimmel, you'd think I'd be all over this (I posted the teaser a while back)Better late than never, rightManny...

Categories: filipino horror, manny pacquiao, philippines, takashi miike, wapakman, wapakman teaser, wapakman trailer

The Shortround: Wade (Review)

Hot off the presses from the jaded viewer inbox of awesomness is a little short entitled Wade. Thanks to director Haynze Whitmore who sent me a screener of the film. After watching the trailers (you can see them all below) I was expecting a zombie exploitation flick. It's a little of both and you can see bits of Ash in the titular character.Here be the plot.WADE is a short film about a war hero that has to adapt to a small town after serving years...

Categories: the shortround, wade

Samurai Princess (Trailer and DVD Release)

It's been a while since a featured some crazy Japanese splatter and gore flick. But if there is one to point out, it has to be from the mind of Kengo Kaji, who wrote Toky Gore Police (full review here). Here he wrote and directs Samurai Princess which is just more insanity and gore (with effects from Yoshihiro Nishimura) and starring Aino Kishi and Mihiro, two Japanese AV stars (thats Japanese porn stars for the uninitiated)With porn stars in the...

Categories: aino kishi, gore, japan av stars, japan av stars nude, mihiro, samurai princess, samurai princess trailer, splatter, splatter gore, tokyo gore police

The Thread: What's your horror movie idea?

It's Friday the 13th! Don't worry, this is not a Friday the 13th retrospective or anything. But I was thinking some of us (the horror bloggers) have watched a great deal of horror flicks. Some of us are even potential filmmakers. We've all said...I can make a better movie than that!But really, do we actually have better ideas of what a good horror movie could be? Well I think I do. Hopefully nobody steals my idea, but if they do, please give me...

Categories: Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon, buffy the vampire slayer, final girl, horror movies, joss whedon, the thread

Grand Theft Auto 4's Super Duper Megatastic Emporium of Television Awesomeness

Well as much as I like to dissect the horror-sphere, sometimes you need to step out of the horror-verse and take in some laughs, watch a comedy or play a video game. And if there is one video game that takes a scathing look at Americana it's Rockstar Games Grand Theft Auto 4. I've played every version of GTA and loved every minute of it. XBox 360 has 2 downloadable games called The Lost and the Damned and The Ballad of Gay Tony. The parodies, the...

Categories: grand theft auto 4, Princess Robot Bubblegum, The Ballad of Gay Tony

The Local (Review)

The LocalThe Local (2008)Directed by Dan Eberle"You begin saving the world by saving one person at a time; all else is grandiose romanticism or politics."-Charles BukowskiAs a born and raised New Yorker, I've become accustomed to the feel and real of the city. When you walk these streets and live and work in the canyon of skyscrapers, you can easily separate the tourists from the tried and true.Somehow, Dan Eberle has pulled off the impossible. He's...

Categories: independent cinema, nyc movie, the local review

The Shortround: Fireman (Short)

Thank the prophets for the country north of the border. Canada keeps churning out great little tidbits of awesomeness and this one is in the form of fake 1980s grindhouse VHS like movie trailers. Part of the Astron-6 collective of Winnipeg, Adam Brooks, director of Fireman just won the the top prize in the Winnipeg Short Film Massacre.You can view the faux trailer below. You can see the Maniac Cop and grindy grindhouse smell of fire burning from...

Categories: fireman short, the shortround

Wrong Turn 3 (Review)

Wrong Turn 3: Left for DeadWrong Turn 3: Left for Dead (2009)Directed by Declan O'BrienIn the first few minutes of Wrong Turn 3, we get full grade A boobies, pot smoking and ocular trauma. You gotta give a film its props for following all the cliches of a cannibal redneck horror film in its initial opening scene.But that's where it slowly tumbles downhill. But that's not to say the tumble isn't fun. The thing about Wrong Turn 3 is your enjoying yourself...

Categories: cannibal films, cannibals, rednecks, wrong turn, wrong turn 2, wrong turn 3, wrong turn 3 review

2009 NYC Horror Film Festival (Featured Films)

Well October is over but for us New Yorkers, the horror keeps screaming. Just announced is the lineup for the NYC Horror Film Festival that takes place from November 18th to the 22nd.Here's some snippers from the official press release.The NYCHFF will take place November 18 - 22, 2009 and will be held at the Tribeca Cinemas, located at 54 Varick Street at Canal Street . The NYCHFF’s Kick-Off Gala will take place on November 18 at 8:00pm at BLVD...

Categories: 2009 grindhouse movies, 2009 horror movies, 2009 horror trailers, 2009 NYC Horror Film Festival, maniac

The Wonderful Crapiness of Chiller TV

As a Time Warner Cable inmate, I actually never knew this channel existed. I never had Direct TV so when this channel launched I was clueless. But as I was talking to Insano Steve as we tried to find Versus on both our satellite and cable systems, I soon stumbled upon Chiller.Who let the wondercrapness out!?! Woot! Woot!Seems I've been missing out on all the crapawesomeness of Chiller.John Carpenter's Vampires! Vampires: The Turning! Bloodrayne!...

Categories: 2009 horror dvd, 2009 horror movies, chiller tv, twilight zone