Tuesday, March 26, 2013

The Underground History of Stealing Cable/Movies

Back before the world of torrents and megaupload, an industry thrived on getting the most bang for your buck when it came to maximixing your cable and movie viewing. I may be dating myself, but I lived in a time when there were only 7 fuckin channels (CBS, NBC, Fox, ABC, your local channels and PBS). When cable came along it was a warped up version of TV. But still we had to figure out ways to buck the system because...who the fuck wants to pay extra right?

So I'm going to take you on a journey of how life was fuckin hard back in the day....when it came to getting free premium channels and well you know porn. Some of you may have done the same. It's a bit of nostalgia for all of us then so let's reminisce shall we?

1.) Stealing HBO (circa the 80s)

Even before Time Warner and Cablevision cornered the market, there was a way to get HBO for free before the world of Cable TV. You just had to have an antenna and box. HBO back in the day broadcasted via signal and so to get the Tyson fights you had to use an antenna stick that could be pointed in a certain direction and get the signal. It came with an old radio box to fine tune the signal. As a kid I would have to go on the roof to fine tune the signal. My dad really wanted to watch Tyson knock out somebody.

2.) The Black Box (the 80s and 90s)

If you're old enough, you remember the black box. The black box was a cable box (all different makes and models) that was reset to allow the box the accept all signals (including premium channels, PPVs and especially porn). It had other names such as cable descrambler but in essence it was set to be in test mode so all channels were accessable. The story usually went a friend of a friend who worked at the cable company could get you one for $100-$150. The drawback was the cable company could "zap" your box and reset it rendering it useless. It was risky proposition but if it remained viable, you'd get your moneys worth. One of your friends had one and stealing cable seemed like no big deal. Of course you could always have the cable guy activate your box for a fee.

3.)  DirecTV and H cards (circa the 90s)

The Internet was just in its infancy and the signal pirates were stealing serious loot. Thanks to DirecTV. All you needed was to purchase a satellite dish, a satellite receiver and a hacked H card. The dish and receiver were legit. The H card was the tricky part. eBay was a haven for purchasing hacked H cards. The card controlled what you were allowed to see. It was an actual card you inserted into your receiver and if you could manipulate it, you had all the channels. This all ended when the dish companies got smart and started zapping the illegal cards. Fun times ended by corporate greedy bastards.

4.) Napster and Limewire (circa the 00s)

I won't rehash Napster lore but Limewire was one of many P2P bit torrent programs to get the same content we wanted from the 80s. Everybody remembers their first download and the classic clips. I mean where did you watch the night vision Paris Hilton sex tape?

5.) The Torrent (present day)

Shhhh. It's still around despite what people say. I mean how you gonna watch Game of Thrones right?

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So I hope that history lesson helped you understand that no matter how hard the television and movie industry try, the underground will find a way to get around it. People are willing to pay for the shows and movies they watch, be it we get what we paid for. Technology will always have loopholes. And where there are loopholes, the pirates will be.

All we want is to watch is some motherfuckin Game of motherfuckin Thrones. Why make it so hard?

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Watch Cannibal Holocaust on YouTube right now (because you can)


Sorry I've been MIA. My TV was fucked up for a few weeks and I couldn't review any movies. But that lead me to watching more Internet videos then I care to admit. Surprisingly, it seems there are quite a lot of cannibal trailers, clips and ENTIRE full length flicks on YouTube.

I've already given you my Top 5 Cannibal Movies of All Time as well as 5 Things I Learned from Cannibal Movies. So I've watched my fair share of these flicks but the Cannibal Holocaust is without a doubt just the most fucked up movie in my movie watching history.

If you're a noob who's self teaching yourself the skid row junkie world of exploitation, it'd be best to view this on an empty stomach.

What a world we live in that you can watch a most fucked up movie on your computer instead of a 4th generation dubbed VHS tape. You kids have it fuckin easy.

Enjoy!

Here are some fun facts for you after you watch the film! How about some FAQ too!

Wednesday, March 06, 2013

The Best Reviews from Maggot Video

I was reading this review of the ultra fucked up Japanese nihilism film All Night Long and I came upon this section of the entry.

Prior to it receiving a DVD release with English subtitles it was heavily distributed on the Video Tape exchange circuit. The film gained a cult status amongst fans due to the films over-the-top violence and disturbing nature.

Ahhh the Video Tape Exchange circuit. Seems so fancy when you say it that way. Basically in other words, it was called horror trading. And people exchanged lists where you would trade your badly dubbed horror movies with their badly dubbed horror movies. I've documented this before.

As one of the sites that inspired this one, Gore Maggot Video was one of my go to guys to trade. Sure I know his real name, but to me and Insano Steve, he'll always be GoreMaggot. And his reviews on his list are legen....wait for it....dary.

We would trade up to 7 movies over postal mail with this guy. Insano Steve would head to Chinatown, get some VCDs, dub them and make trades. It was the ONLY way to see cult and crazy fucked up movies in the late 90s and early 00's. This died down when torrenting became crazy prevalent as well as YouTube but I still have a collection of VHS tapes from my horror trading days. Alas the irony is I have no VHS player to ever watch them again.

Maggot Video reviews sold themselves. I've collected a few below for you to enjoy but first check out. Enjoy!

I CAN DO D.V.D.'s NOW!!!!!!!!....Same prices as the videos,so let me know what you want.all titles are from international source, from one collector to another, no rights implied or given.I'm always getting new cool stuff so check back every couple of months.Thank you.

all titles come in clam-shell case with cover-art and printed disc's(with only a few exceptions).If you don't care about the color cover & case, I'll sell you as many as you want for only 8.00 $ each!

videos and D.V.D.'s are  recorded  in  SP  mode on high quality tapes & D.V.D.R's for best picture and sound quality

$10.00 per title (plus shipping, please see shipping rates)
get any 10 flicks for 80 bucks postage paid!

 
Great reviews of "Extreem" films. The spelling errors were part of the charm in my opinion.

DAS KOMABRUTALE  DUELL--WOW!!!!!! This is one sick puppy! I just got this in not too long ago ,once again ,its in German with no subs....but who gives a fuck!!!this shit rocks. This flick ranks right up there with PREMUTOS for unrelenting ultre gore and insanity.They use more fake blood in this than any flick I've seen in a long time(Maby the most ever) definatly one of the goriest flicks on this site. There is a scene where a guy sneaks up on a pregnant woman sitting on a bench in a park(I think its the broad from the picture below),he comences to kill her very brutally...then he cuts out her twin fetuses...throws them down and does a tatter masher stomp on them.This movie is sick.  HIGHLY RECOMMENDED FOR SICKO'S

Great reviews of Takashi Miike films

CITY OF LOST SOULS--Yet another kick ass flick by Takashi Miike(VISITOR Q) This one is an action flick on the same lines as Time & Tide but alot bloodier,plus he had a 4 million doller budget for this one and the F/X are awsome!You gotta see the CGI kung fu cock fight,it's like a MATRIX chicken fight.CRAZY!!!
 

GRAVEYARD OF HONOR—Cool Takashi Miike flick with lots of Yakuza violence ,abused women and drug induced insanity.

VISITOR Q--This is a very fucked up flick by Takashi Miike (Fudoh: A New Generation,Audition)This is his answer to GUMMO & REQUIEM FOR A DREAM.Lets just say this is the disfunctional family flick to top them all,This is way sicker than those other flicks though.If you are currently happy with your family situation,DONT! let your wife see this movie(or any of the guinea pigs for that matter 

Sometimes, you don't know the titles.

DEAD BABY DOLL (DONT KNOW THE TITLE FOR THIS ONE SO I MADE UP THIS )

I've seen this film and I agree.

DR.LAMB--Sick!sick!sick!cat.3(serial killer flick)


Sometimes he didn't have subs on his movies.

EROTIC NIGHTMARE—H/K Cat. 3 with Anthony Wong (Untold Story ,Ebola Syndrom) chinese language only. Sorry. 


MU ZAN E---THIS GROUP OF FLICKS STARTING WITH THE RED ROOM ARE PART OF A NEW LINE OF TOTALLY FUCKED UP FETISH/GORE FLICKS COMEING OUT OF JAPAN.SAID TO BE "THE NEW GUINEA PIGS" THESE FLICKS ARE WAY OVER THE TOP FUCKED UP.ALOT OF MENSTRAL FETISH SHIT IN THESE FOR SOME REASON(LIKE SUCKING A MOUTHFULL OUT & SPITTING IT OUT ALL OVER THE PLACE. SICK! THESE FLICKS ARE ABOUT AN HOUR EACH ,IN JAP. WITH NO SUBS,SORRY....PRETTY EASY TO FOLLOW THOUGH.


He used the "kick ass" alot in his reviews Which is how that phrase ended up in my reviews

FEMALE CONVICT SCOROION: JAILHOUSE 41----Kick ass,good quality,letterboxed,English subs(these flicks are cool,they look like they came from the same era as the babycart flicks,70's for sure.Beautifully shot..nice and violent and exploitational)

Some of his movies weren't for kids and he'd let you know. 

GAMERA 3,THE REVENGE OF IRIS--AWSOME!AWSOME1AWSOME1not for kids,blew me away!
GAMERA,GUARDIAN OF THE UNIVERSE
--TOTALLY AWSOME!NOT FOR LITTLE KID'S 


We horror trader bootleggers suffered from copying the same dubbed copy over and over again and trading that shit.

ICHI THE KILLER--SUPER ULTRA GORY TAKASHI MIIKE FLICK! KILLER CGI GORE F/X ,TWISTED STORY. THE QUALITY ISNT THE BEST,BUT ITS WATCHABLE.THIS IS THE PRINT THATS GOING AROUND,IF YOU KNOW OF A BETTER PRINT THAT LET ME KNOW. HIGHLY RECOMENDED. 



Sometimes movies only needed one word reviews.
 
THE RAPE MAN- cool!
 
 And sometimes he gave you a fuckin screenplay for a review.

PSYCHO: THE SNUFF REELS aka. TUMBLING DOLL OF FLESH--Thomas Takanawa, Richard Fujimoto and Harold Akira are three lonely Japanese teens bored of their middle-classed existence. But before you can say American Pie, Bettie Hirohito enters the picture. She is young and effervescent; a robust example of youth and vivacity. “Hey guys!,” exclaims Thomas. “I’ve got my dad’s video camera. Let’s make a movie!” “What kind of movie?,” ponders Bettie. “A porn, of course,” shout all three males in unison; their wistful synchronicity and pleading eyes eventually persuading a begrudging Bettie. Harold, being the most endowed of the three plunders Betties hirsute vagina while the other boys shout words of encouragement and film the act. However, everyone knows that promiscuity and pornography lead young strays like our protagonists down a menacing path of illicit deeds and murder. And thusly, Yellow Love turns into the Slant-Eyed Slaughter. Bettie is tied down and forced to endure a bizarre mélange of physically sexual depravities. Bettie is chopped, diced and pureed into a mishmash of pulverized flesh and splintered bone. Psycho delivers a deluge of spilled blood and butchered flesh; its undertaking is another sick, but pointless endeavour where flesh is pitted against sharpened steel and as always, comes up short. While the film takes far too long to finally bombard you with some wonderfully vile acts, Psycho: The Snuff Reels is a hilarious romp that eschews typical pornography and gore motifs by combining the two styles; Psycho is a tumor rooted in Guinea Pig/Flowers Of Flesh And Blood and August Underground Mordum. It is an exciting Japanese gornography epic with a modicum of verisimilitude hindered only by annoying genital fogging.SICK!!SICK!!SICK!! Japanese language only. 


 I'll do a second part if you enjoyed this one. So who traded horror back in the day? Sound off if you did.