Dead Hooker in a Trunk (Review)

Dead Hooker in a Trunk

Dead Hooker in a Trunk (2009)

Directed by Jen and Sylvia Soska

Sometimes I put a trailer up and hype up an indie film and then what happens is I actually never get to see the film. But when I put up the trailer for Dead Hooker in a Trunk I actually got a comment from the filmmakers themselves. It was a first and totally threw me in a loop.

They even blogged about my initial thoughts which was super duper cool. Because of this little bit of acknowledgment from indie filmmaker to indie blog I kept the Soska Sisters on my personal radar. When they released a little short called Bad Girls, I posted it immediately.

So when the movie was making the rounds in festivals I contacted them immediately for a screener so I could expand my thoughts. Which leads us to this review. I sometimes hype up a movie in my head and it gets the best of me. Would Dead Hooker in a Trunk live up to its awesome title?

Oh most fuckin definitely.

DHIAT is a modern day black comedy exploitation film of pulpy goodness. As the title suggests, shit hits the fan when our troupe of twin sisters, a Jesus freak and a junkie find a dead hooker in a trunk. It starts off a chain reaction of ass kicking, appendages being ripped apart, some sexual molesting and a bloody bloodbath.

The Soska Sisters first feature film is raw in that grindhouse way and has that Tarantino feel with a extra dose of indie grittiness. You'll laugh, you'll wince, you'll metal head bob your head due to the awesome soundtrack. It's a fun time when you find a dead hooker in a trunk. I wish that happened everyday!

Boring Plot-O-Matic

Set in beautiful Vancouver, four friends set out on an everyday errand and end up in a fight for their lives when they discover the body of a dead hooker left in their trunk. Lead by a sexy, impulsive Badass, her distant Geek twin sister, their bible thumping, Jesus loving Goody Two Shoes friend, and a chaotic, rock star Junkie pal, the group has to put aside their differences to dispose of the body before they're next.

Thrown into their own personal purgatory, they face off against persistent police, a sleazy motel manager, chainsaw wielding triads, and a brutal serial killer. All the while they are followed by a mysterious Cowboy Pimp who wants to claim the corpse for his own. Will they uncover the truth behind the body and be able to stand up to their demons?

Buckle up and get ready for the ride of your life filled with gun fights, extreme violence, blood, guts, gore, and goats. Dead Hooker In A Trunk is the unexpected first feature film written, directed, and produced by identical twin sisters, Jen and Sylvia Soska. The two newcomers created an impossible film that is an underground sensation, destined to become a cult classic and will make you fall in love with films again!

Awesome Review-O-Matic

Badass (Sylvia Soska) and Geek (Jen Soska) are twin sisters who work the opposite twin thing to a tee. Badass is exactly that, a bad fuckin ass. Geek is at the end of the rainbow, clean and nerdy. After Badass parties up with Junkie (Rikki Gagne), they pick up Goody Two Shoes (CJ Walls) Geek's Jesus lovin friend. The only place this movie could go is to the title.

And at about 16 minutes that's when it comes. Dead hooker in a trunk. Soon our foursome are tasked with disposing of said dead hooker. In a way it reminded me of when Jules and Vincent had the task of cleaning up their mess in Pulp Fiction. It's not easy to get rid of a body.

The relationships between the sisters is comic-ly timed. Jen and Sylvia are comfortable playing off each other and though its been done before, they do it in a new horror and suicide girls sort of way. Mixing in their hotness with some ridiculousness the movie plays out their relationship nicely.

Goody is pure comedy and CJ Walls is hilarious as the vomit prone God freak. Gagne as Junkie plays crackhead trauma nicely (and at one point loses her arm).

Avoiding getting caught by the police, they travel from motel to junkie den and end up in a penultimate shootout where Badass annihilates a drug infiltrating Triad gang. For an indie film, the effects were top notch. Oozing intestines, top notch gunshots to the head and blood spraying trauma are in full effect. I was pleasantly surprised by the insanity of it all. Our misfits though are not immune by the violence and are too violated with chainsawed arms and ocular trauma. The gore and splatter levels were off the chart.

It's absurdly insane, logic thrown out the window but that's the fun of it all.

Later, the killer of our dead hooker seeks revenge and trauma is inflicted by the four on a few baddies which leads to the twisty twizzler ending. A few gripes I'll admit I had about the film were a few flat jokes, some misplaced scenes and a flashback explaining the motives of the killer that ended up towards the end of the movie.

Other than that, DHIAT is five by five.

The Soska Sisters made a film they wanted to make and they ventured out and did it. It's a testament to them and their crew and is the true spirit of indie filmmaking. You have to love the tenacity of these two to make a film this ambitious. Nothing feels amateurish or low budget. It feels like a film made for me and my brethren who love grindhouse black comedies.

DHIAT is a mad mad bizzaro movie that has everything you would want. Hot kick ass girls, some ha ha's and LOLs and one killer soundtrack. I've got the Soska Sisters on my radar, it's time the rest of the world has them on theirs.

Gore-ipedia

Gunshots to the head
Arm trauma
Ocular trauma
Intestine oozing
Pyrocide
Snapped necks

Nude-ipedia

We get one twin almost...I said almost!

WTF moment

That ocular trauma came out of nowhere

The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis

I'm not sure of a DVD release but the Soska Sisters just finished screening the film at some festivals. If your a movie/horror blogger, hit them up for a possible screener on Twitter @twisted_twins.

Also check out their blog and the official site.

When I saw the trailer, I wrote:

"What's not to love about junkies, bad asses, hot women and a dead hooker in a trunk?"

It's still dead on true. What's not to love? If you want to sit back, smoke some weed and see a fun fun fun fun film, Dead Hooker in a Trunk is the film for you. It's a cult classic in waiting and a hidden gem in indie filmmaking.

Rating:

The Trailer

Categories: dead hooker in a trunk, dead hooker in a trunk trailer, exploitation, exploitation film, grindhouse, independent cinema, indepentent horror, indie horror, soska sisters

Kick-Ass (Review)

Kick-Ass

Kick-Ass (2010)

Directed by Matthew Vaughn

"With no power comes no responsibility"

-Kick-Ass

I had the super duper lucky opportunity to see Kick Ass early thanks to a UGO.com/Lions Gate screening for the NYC premiere of Kick Ass. Not only did I get to see the best superhero/comic book movie since The Dark Knight or Iron Man (take your pick), but Mark Millar and John Romita Jr., the writer and artist of the comic were also in attendance to do an awesome Q&A.

I'll get to the fun facts of that Q&A at the end of this review, but now here comes the fun part. I get to have a full frontal superhero orgasm for all of you.

This is one of the best movies of 2010.

Kick Ass kicks so much fuckin ass, I wanted to put on some spandex, fight crime and spew witty vulgarities with my 11 yr old female cousin dressed as Hit Girl. Which brings us to why Kick Ass is awesome-tastic.

It's not the titular character that blows you away (though he does have his hilarious moments) but it's Hit Girl, the potty mouth pre-pubescent tween daughter of Big Daddy (Nic Cage doing his best Adam West impersonation) that steals the show. Chloe Moretz is so fantastic as Hit Girl you sincerely believe she loves ice cream sundaes and switchblades and can assassinate an army of mafiosos with a blink of an eye. (FYI: Moretz will star as Abby the vampire in Let Me In, the American remake of Let the Right One In)

Never has a little girl been so lethal with guns, yo yo string MacGyver devices and a blade.

Let's kick some ass with this review. SOME MILD SPOILERS BELOW.

Boring Plot-O-Matic

Adapted from Mark Millar's hyper-violent comic book of the same name, director Matthew Vaughn (Layer Cake)'s vigilante superhero film tells the tale of an average New York teenager who decides to don a costume and fight crime. Comic book geek Dave Lizewski (Aaron Johnson) may not have good coordination or special powers, but that doesn't mean he isn't a fully-capable crime fighter. After purchasing a flashy wet-suit on the internet, Dave starts busting up baddies with nothing but brute force. He calls himself Kick-Ass, and he can take a beating as good as he can dish one out.

Before long, Kick-Ass has become a local sensation, and others are following his lead. Big Daddy (Nicolas Cage) and Hit-Girl (Chloe Moritz) are a father-daughter crime-fighting duo who have set their sights on local mob heavy Frank D'Amico (Mark Strong). They're doing a decent job of dismantling Frank's sizable underworld empire when Kick-Ass gets drawn into the fray. But Frank's men play rough, and his son Chris (Christopher Mintz-Plasse) is about to become Kick-Ass' very first arch nemesis.

When Chris assumes the persona of Red Mist, the stage is set for a superhero showdown that could spell the end of Kick-Ass once and for all.

Awesome Review-O-Matic

The superhero movies that have recently come out are filled with your favs: Superman, Batman, Iron Man, Hulk. It's rare to have a comic book movie get made where you aren't too familiar with the characters. And I'll be honest, I had never heard of Kick Ass until a few months back. Having seen the trailer, it looked super duper cool and knowing it was written by Mark Millar (who also wrote Wanted), I knew it was going to be mega-tastic. (Don't judge Wanted by the Jolie flick, the graphic novel is far superior and completely different from the flick).

So brushing up on the knowledge, I decided to go in clean and not pick up the comic at all. I usually do read the comics most comic book movies are based on but I decided not to on this one. And I'm glad I didn't.

The movie stands alone and riddled me with a thousand bullets of glee. And to NOT know anything made it all the waaay awesomer. So lets get to the awesomeness.

Every movie has 3 acts. So I'm going to break it down that way.

Act 1: "Dave Lizewski meet Kick Ass"

The opening of Kick-Ass is in the trailer. And every time I watch it, I LOL. Act I is the origin of Kick Ass and it starts with the question. Why hasn't someone tried to be a real life superhero? That's what Dave Lizewski decides to do. The brilliance of Kick Ass is that it slightly parodies the Spiderman origin story.

We have the same NYC setting, a nerdy loner, a crush on the hot girl, dorky friends and an arch enemy whose filthy rich. But if Spiderman is all that is right, Kick Ass is all that is bizarro. Dave doesn't have special powers and thus why the line I started this review echoes loudly.

Soon, Kick Ass is an Internet sensation racking up YouTube views and MySpace friends (what no Facebook?). Dave is enjoying his alter ego and who wouldn't enjoy being a full fledged superhero, hooking up with the hottie and being popular.

Top 3 Scenes of Act 1

• Kick Ass gets his ass kicked
• Kick Ass gets his ass kicked again but kicks ass himself
• Kick Ass becomes a phenomenon

Act 2: "Kick Ass meet Big Daddy and Hit Girl"

Our introduction to these two is best illustrated through this awesome clip below.




Damon Macready was once a supercop (his back story is told in an animated comic panel) and with his daughter Mindy are the living parody of Batman and Robin. I'd like to say they are BETTER than that ambiguous gay duo. As Big Daddy and Hit Girl, they are a lethal combination and every scene they're in is magic. Nic Cage plays the crazy, vigilante father so perfectly, it's like he was born to play Big Daddy.

But Chloe Moretz as Mindy aka Hit Girl is so tweeny cute, when she goes into action against a street gang whose got Kick Ass on the ropes, it's violent gory fun. The comic doesn't spare you the gruesomeness of annihilating the criminal underground and the movie is slickly splatterific as advertised. Head wounds, gunshots and some slice and dice by our minuscule misfit are violent poetry.

And she's waaaaaay Buffy funny too replying to Kick Ass in one scene.

Dave Lizewski: How do I get a hold of you?
Hit Girl: [sarcastically] Just contact the mayor, he has a special signal that shines in the sky! It's in the shape of a giant cock

Top 3 Scenes of Act 2

• That scene above
• Hit Girl goes Hit Girl (little tween girls saying cunt is soooooo cute)
  
• Introduction of Red Mist (played by McLovin guy from SuperBad...that guy is awesome!)
  

Act 3: "Kick Ass, Big Daddy and Hit Girl meet Red Mist and Frank D'Amico"

So whose the big bad in this movie? Well we get a NYC kingpin (diet version) named Frank D'Amico. Seems Big Daddy has a vendetta against D'Amico and he's cleaning up D'Amico henchman faster than you can say cunt. Soon Kick Ass is not alone in the superhero business. Red Mist aka Chris D'Amico aka McLovin join Kick Ass in his crusade but not everything is as it seems.

Our heroes face endless peril, one of them goes down and all hell breaks loose. It's an ending that kicks so much ass, my ass still hurts. The movie balances ha ha's and visual comedy but then smashes you with the over the top action you crave in any comic you'd read. The ending is satisfying in that ice cream sundae sorta way. After the movie had ended, I felt the urge to run to my comic book store and pick it up. OK, I think I'm done comic orgasming.

Top 3 Scenes of Act 3

• Hit Girl to the rescue!
  
• Hit Girl infiltrates D'Amico HQs
• The final battle

Matthew Vaughn (who directed Stardust and financed this movie by himself and a few others) balances Millar's story, picks a few choice panels from JrJr. and amplifies Chloe Moretz's performance to the max. It works on so many levels: comedy, action and comic genius.

This is the best movie of 2010 so far, I can't see anything being better. When you watch Kick Ass it reveals the not so secret of comics these days. There are comics for adults that flip upside down the conventional comic book narrative.

Garth Ennis and Frank Miller you've seen. Hell if people actually understood what Alan Moore and Dave Gibson did in Watchmen, they'd understand how awesome a movie and comic it is and how it too rewrote the standard comic book formula.

Kick-Ass is simply perfection in what a comic book movie is suppose to be. It politely mocks the genre but knows what the audience came to see. Witty humor, POW! BAM! action and a new band of heroes that you won't ever forget. Kick-Ass sits on the throne of comic book movie royalty daring anybody to take away it's crown. Hit Girl says it best.

"OK cunts, let's see what you can do now"

Gore-ipedia

Gunshot trauma
Slice and Dice
Lots of ass kicking
Massive amounts of violence

WTF moment

Hit Girl's one girl army rescue operation

The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis

Kick-Ass comes out on April 16th. I can keep telling you how awesome it is but you'll have to see it for yourself. Seeing a 13 yr old girl kill without mercy, spew fuck and cunt in a few lines and use a hit-arang is so satisfying you may actually see this more than once.

As promised, below is some video of the NYC premiere. If you need some Kick-Ass info, UGO has a few cool articles that include a Kick-Ass 101, Top Groups to be Offended by Kick-Ass, Mark Millar bio and the Most Kick Ass Panels in Kick-Ass.

Finally, here is footage of the NYC premiere of Kick-Ass with a Q&A with Millar and Romita Jr.





No doubt it gets 4 spinkicks. It's your responsibility to see this movie when it comes out on April 16th. That's your power.

Rating:

The Trailer

Categories: comic books. graphic novels, comics, graphic novel, kick-ass, kick-ass exclusive clip, kick-ass trailer

Saturday Nightmares Expo 2010 (March 19-21)

If you're still itching after attending Monster Mania and need another horror fix, another great horror expo is taking place in Jersey City, New Jersey this weekend. Saturday Nightmares is having a Dead trilogy reunion of sorts with George A. Romero in attendance. Other guests include your Dead trilogy alum:

Ken Foree (Dawn)
Scott Renieger (Dawn)
David Emge (Dawn)
Gaylen Ross (Dawn)
Tom Pilato (Day)

and of course the one and only Tom Savini.

Also in attendance is the great Adrienne Barbeau who stars in the short I introduced to you all called Alice Jacobs is Dead directed by Alex Horwitz (who will also be in attendance). The short will also be screened as well.

As you know I raved about how awesome Alice Jacobs is and this is your chance to see it!

They are also screening all the Dead movies and I'm sure George is going to show some Survival footage. I'm going to try to go but I urge you to head over there as well.

Categories: alice jacobs is dead, dawn of the dead final scene, day of the dead, george romero, the shortround, zombies

Last Call (The First Interactive horror movie in theaters...wait say what?)

Well you probably all heard about this little gimmicky horror movie from the coverage last week. If you didn't head over to Dread Central or Horror Squad for more info.

Basically 13th Street Films (a company based out of Germany) is promoting the first interactive horror film where a theater-goer gets a call from the protagonist and he or she helps the final girl make decisions in the movie in real time.

Read this:

The first interactive horror movie in the world where the audience is able to communicate with the protagonist. A film controlled by a member of the audience, thus blurring the boundaries between game and film. Language recognition software transforms the participant's answers via mobile phone into specific instructions. A specially developed software then processes these commands and launches an appropriate follow-up scene.

The dialogue between the movie's main actress and an audience member leads to a different film - and outcome - every time: sometimes with a happy end, sometimes with a more gruesome one. To participate in the adventure, audience members submit their mobile phone numbers to a speed dial code when they buy their tickets.

The moment the female protagonist takes out her phone to call someone who might be able to help her, the film's controlling software contacts one of the submitted mobile phone numbers. Once the viewer picks up, he hears the actress's voice - who tells him she would be lost without him. He has to help her escape by choosing a path through the old, rundown sanatorium.

Furthermore, he also decides whether she should help other victims to flee the scene - and every single choice shapes her fate: it's a matter of life and death.

OK, got all that? Now check out the trailer.




Hmmmm interesting in that "this is sooo gonna be abused" sorta way. It's not the first to do a choose your own adventure sorta thing. Interactive DVDs have been out for a while...hell even porn DVDs have "various interactivity". This prompts a few questions.

Sure, I think Germans would follow the instructions to the tee. Maybe even the Brits, Aussies and Canadians too would participate in an orderly way. But give an American the option to fuck up would be victim in a horror movie and it can only turn out completely fucked up. I think it would turn out to be a disaster where we'd get some jabroni mess up the movie for everybody else. We'd get exchanges like this.

Final Girl: "Go up or down?"
American jabroni phone counterpart: "Take off your top and let me see your titties"

Final Girl: "Help or flee"
American jabroni phone counterpart: "Fuck him, get the fuck out of their girl and run for your life! Get me 6 pack of Bud if you can."

See? We can't get anything nice. It would turn into a complete mockery. Imagine the douchebag asshole getting chosen or Ms. Joanna Moviegoer making all the wrong decisions. You'd get tons of people yelling at you what to do. It would be mad chaos I tell you. People running around in the theater and the worst thing that would come out of this would be......

Everybody's phone would turned on during the movie!!!!

Can you imagine?

OK maybe I'm being a little down on us Americans but you know how it is. Even during a regular horror movie, people be yelling shit at the screen. And what happens if your suggestions after the movie in a bad way? Can it actually do that? Can you get her killed? Wouldn't you want that outcome instead of a daring escape?

So this leads to whether or not your advice actually affects the story in anyway. How many different outcomes could their be in such a interactive movie? Lots of questions on this.

You gotta love horror genre because it's a pure testing ground for all that is movie gimmicks. Like William Castle's "Percepto" vision where seats "tingled" while watching The Tingler or the advent of 3-D which turned that invention into mainstreaminess, horror is the testing ground of these ideas. Horror movies always embraced the 3D where the other genres (other than sci-fi) thought it had no real value.

So, horror minions....could this actually work? What do you all think?

Categories: 13th street films, 2010 horror movies, 3d, 3d horror movies, interactive horror movie, last call

Splatter Disco (Review)

Splatter Disco

Splatter Disco (2007)

Directed by Richard Griffin

Richard Griffin and his Scorpio Film Releasing are relatively new to me. I had never heard of his films until I stumbled upon Nun of That (review here). So when I won a contest, I got some other Griffin films as well which included Creature from the Hillbilly Lagoon (not gonna review because I've been told if you don't have anything good to say....), Feeding the Masses (possible review upcoming) and this flick.

Well it was billed as "The First Slasher Musical" so I was hoping that I'd see some musical numbers in the same vain as Poultrygeist: Chicken of the Dead.

But not everything that's hyped can live up to the billing. Splatter Disco has some splatter, some disco and some big name stars (see Ken Foree and Debbie Rochon). It's got some decent acting, a slasher on the prowl and something I didn't expect. Furries!

Really furries?

Boring Plot-O-Matic

Kent Chubb thinks life couldn't possibly get any worse when the mayor, his sociopath mother (Lynn Lowry), and the city council threaten to close down his nightclub Den O' Iniquity for "acts of perversion." Enlisting the help of his father, Shank Chubb (Ken Foree), Kent and club regulars attempt to educate the town to the community service function of the club: providing a safe and welcoming environment for all the oddball local citizens. Little do they know a serial killer has begun to pick off club employees one by one, and now even Kent's acid-flashback-prone hippie attorney can't help them out of this bloody mess...or keep his eyes off Kent's gorgeous wife (Debbie Rochon).

Awesome Review-O-Matic

I'm not explaining plot. I mean it's right up there. As we meet all the deviant characters of the Den O Iniquity, they are pretty interesting. Lots of them are regulars in Griffin films (many of them are in Nun of That).

So who are these degenerates?

1. Kent: Our Mr. Manager who wants to keep his club open so all these fetishers have a place to go
2. His dad Shank: the owner of the club and a sick old dancing man
3. Danni: A Furry who wants to be loved
4. Echo: He repeats the last line you say and is secretly in love with Danni
5. A bunch of other misfits

As the mayor's mom tries to shut down the club, the clubers start to get picked off one by one. Not much to report on splatter. There's a few oozey blood, but it's the PG-13 variety. But that's not important. There are about 5 musical numbers in Splatter Disco. The first one is the only one that I found actually fun. It has furries. So check it out below (not sure why the audio is unsynced)





The other musical numbers are a lawyer's lament, a few dance numbers, a Ken Foree number and something else that I don't remember. All of these are unremarkable. I had thought after the Furries number which I thought was hilarious we'd get more of the same. Well there's more gibberish and talk than singing in Splatter Disco.

Some of the dialogue is goofy Troma funny and it definitely has that feel. But the movie drags and there's serious gaps between musical scenes. Even the supposed twist only leads to a yaaaaaaaaaaaawn ending. Good performances overall by the cast and Sarah Nicklin is next door neighbor hot. Having seen this after Nun of That may have made me jaded but I had high expectations for this one.

I mean a slasher musical is a great concept. But unfortunately the music portion was a major fail. The worst part of the movie is now I got the damn Furries lyrics stuck in my head. Arghhhh!

I think these are the lyrics.

Chimpanzees in the zoo do it
Some courageous kangaroos do it
Let's do it, let's fall in love

???? do it
Bees do it
Even educated fleas do it
Let's do it, let's fall in love

I'm sure giraffes on the slide do it
Every hippotamus do it
Let's do it, let's fall in love.........

The other lyrics are pretty funny as it goes along.

Rating:

1/2

Check out the trailer

Categories: musical, slasher films, splatter, splatter disco, splatter gore, top splatter movies

Patrick Vive Ancora (Review)

Patrick Viva Ancora aka Patrick Still Lives

Directed by Mario Landi

The jaded viewer says: Unofficial sequel to the Australian made "Patrick". Has nothing to do with the original but is mildly entertaining in its own right. Plot revolves around some guests who come to a village resort to get some R&R. Unknown to them, telekinetic and ESP coma victim Patrick is on life support and has a rush towards sex and a little bit of the ultraviolence.

Using his power for evil, he makes a nurse strip for his viewing pleasure and in one of the most ingenious scenes in the entire movie he kills a woman by using a pole that is inserted up a woman's you know what and exits out of her mouth. I think the whole budget was spent on that gratuitous shot alone. Good stuff. Very Italian.

Rating:

1/2

The Trailer

Categories: patrick, patrick still lives, patrick viva ancore

Shogun Assassin (Review)

Directed by Robert Houston, Kenji Misumi

Insano Steve says: Greatest samurai movie of all time, action-wise. Shogun-less samurai wanders countryside with infant boy in baby carriage in search of redemption, revenge and gore. Our samurai cuts and kills people with such efficiency, O.J. Simpson would be proud.

No samurai flick has as much splatter, not to mention the awesome killer cart the baby rides in and some of the coolest bad guys in any movie (3 badasses with pointy straw hats - there is no cooler accessory than a pointy straw hat). Shogun wants samurai dead and has hundreds of men, but samurai is a bad mother fucker with no conscience.

The benchmark to which all other swordplay movies will be judged.

HIGHEST RECOMMENDATION.

Rating:
The Trailer

Categories: japanese, japanese atrocities, japanese exploitation, japanese gore, samurai

Vote for your friendly, neighborhood horror blogger: The Jaded Viewer!

Voting has now opened for Mr. Horror Blogosphere 09. I am the 3rd entry over @ Zombies Don't Run. I thought I was uber funny with the Q and A (look at me being fuckin cocky) Though at 2% of the vote I feel like Nader in 2000.

So check out my entry over at Zombie's Don't Run and remember...vote for me! (or vote for your the other guy...but if you do, the terrorists win). So a vote for the jaded viewer is a vote for America!

Mr. Horror Blogosphere Entry #3: The Jaded Viewer!

Categories: horror blog, horror blogging, jadedviewer, jadedviewer.com, the jaded viewer

The Shortround: Murder Baby

Peter Podgursky, a USC grad student who directed the fun film Cheerbleeders has brought to my attention is newest short entitled: Murder Baby.

And it's pretty damn funny and 100% has an uber shocking ending. Good times all around.

Check it out below and head over to the Facebook page and become a fan!

Categories: cheerbleeders, cheerbleeders free, cheerbleeders review, horror short, indepentent horror, indie horror, short, short film, the shortround

A Day in the Life Yo, They be rappin their lines as they go

Thank the gods for Insano Steve's endless search for the modern day blaxsploitation movie. Like an innocent bystander getting shot, Insano Steve found this awesome flick from the depths of DVD obscurity. What is it?

It's a hip hop/rappin musical brought to you by Sticky Fingaz (from the group Onyx). I'm not kidding. Think Waist Deep meets Menace to Society meets Annie.

Insano Steve is gonna review this bad boy for ya so in the meantime check out the trailer below. It's bloody, its graphic, it stars multiple people you know (from rappers to black actors). It's got baby mammas, gangstas, cops and hitmen.

It's fuckin awesome. You feel me?

Check out the long ass trailer.





Check out the shorty trailer homey.

Categories: 10 Best Black Films Of The 1990s, blaxploitation, gangsta movies

Thank you Blogger for making my life hell

If your reading this, you've ended up somehow on my temporary move to a BlogSpot account. Alas I tried to move to a subdomain but shit aint working correctly.

This has been a freakin nightmare. Nothing works now on my blog and I may have to start from scratch with Google Friend Connect. Sigh.

I'm going to keep trying to fix everything so probably no posts for a while until I can get everything working correctly.

In the meantime, you can follow me on Twitter or head over to the jaded viewer Facebook page for your daily dose of jaded-isms.

Thanks!
Jeff

Categories: jadedviewer, jadedviewer.com, the jaded viewer

The Jaded Viewer is going offline (only for a few days...I hope)

Hey fellow jaded minions. Well due to some Blogger updates and some migration protocols on Blogger, I'm going to have to go offline for a few days. I've been publishing on Blogger via FTP and Blogger is forcing me to have my site hosted with them instead.

Hence, I'm going to have to migrate my blog, change some settings, yada yada yada.

Most of the horror blogosphere is at a blogspot domain or on Wordpress. Lucky for you, you guys aren't affected. But for the few of us that have our own domains or FTP, we have to update. If you're one of the ones who have a custom domain, you should check out Blogger's FTP blog. It details all the instructions we'll need to do before FTP-ing is disabled starting May 1st.

You may get a Page Cannot Be Found or the site will look like it's disappeared. That's just me turning the frozen donkey wheel (gratuitous Lost reference!)

When I do return, I have a ton of reviews to put up, more lists for you to check out and 100% pure entertainment that you can find here at your friendly, neighborhood horror blog.

In the meantime, you can follow me on Twitter or head over to the jaded viewer Facebook page for your daily dose of jaded-isms.

Be back soon!
Jeff

Categories: horror blogging, jadedviewer, jadedviewer.com, the jaded viewer

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Glenn Kay's Top 25 Zombie Movies of All Time

I went to a thrift store a few weeks ago and in their book department was this little book that I figured I could pick up on the cheap. Zombie Movies: The Ultimate Guide by Glenn Kay. I am not familiar with Glenn Kay but I figure he wrote a book so he must have some street cred.

The book is an interesting read on the origins of the zombie film (it's Haiti voodoo for the uninformed) and the classic zombie films to the modern day cult flicks. Kay reviews an encyclopedia of zombie movies rating them with brain eating cartoons for the best and arrows in the head for the worst.

What I found to be the most interesting though is he wrote down his own list of the Top 25 Zombie Movies of All Time. I love lists (even when they aren't even my own) but I have my own top 10 zombie movies of all time list which I'll include below.

The one thing you can count on with lists is there will be blood as people will criticize or praise to the end of eternity what's on this list. If you want to know why he has one movie ranked higher, pick up the book. It's available on Amazon.com.

Here's the list! (FYI: this was published in 2008) Let the arguing begin!

1. Dawn of the Dead
2. Night of the Living Dead
3. Shaun of the Dead
4. Day of the Dead
5. Braindead
   
6. Re-Animator
7. The Return of the Living Dead
8. 28 Days Later
9. The Serpent and the Rainbow
10. White Zombie
11. The Walking Dead
12. Night of the Living Dead (90)
13. Dellamorte Dellamore
14. Prince of Darkness
15. Night of the Creeps
16. Creepshow: "Father's Day"
17. Dead & Buried
18. Grindhouse: "Planet Terror"
19. Zombi 2
20. Land of the Dead
21. Let Sleeping Corpses Lie
22. I Walked with a Zombie
23. Tales from the Crypt: "Poetic Justice"
24. Sugar Hill
25. Plan 9 from Outer Space

the jaded viewer says: I agree with his #1 as its on my own list. But to put Shaun of the Dead at #3 is a little much. Even Day of.... in the top 10 is little extreme. OK, as promised here is my own which I wrote on 2002. Why am I posting a list from 2002? I don't know...I figure it could stand to take some criticism. Has there been a zombie movie since 2002 that I should add?
I mean I still think its pretty solid.

I should write a little explanation on each but I'm a lazy bastard so sue me. After looking at the list, I have Evil Dead 2 on it. Also I have 3 Fulci movies on this list. I remember I was on some kind of Fulci kick back in 02. Ahh memories. As an added bonus, I've posted Insano Steve's Top 10 zombie movies of all time as well.

the jaded viewer's Top 10 Zombie Movies of All Time (as of 4/1/02)

1. Dawn of the Dead
2. Night of the Living Dead
3. Zombi 2
4. Braindead
5. The Beyond
6. Re-Animator
7. The Gates of Hell
8. Evil Dead 2
   
9. Night of the Creeps
   
10. Dellamorte Dellamore

Insano Steve's Top 10 Zombie Movies of All Time (as of 4/1/02)

1. Zombi 2
2. Braindead
3. Evil Dead
4. Re-Animator
5. Versus
   
6. Dawn of the Dead
7. Demons
8. Dellamorte Dellamore
9. Night of the Creeps
10. Zombie Holocaust

Thoughts about Kay's list, Insano Steve's or my own list? Hell, what's your list of the best zombie movies of all time?

Categories: george romero, moshing zombies, top 5 scenes in lucio fulci's zombi 2, zombi 2, zombies

Ringu & Ringu 2 (Review)

Ringu

Directed by Hideo Nakata, Chisui Takigawa

Insano Steve says: The wildly popular Ring is the story of an urban legend where the watching of a certain videotape will cause you to die within a week's time. Female journalist tries to find the existence of this tape and how it came to being. Assisting her is psychic friend who has sight beyond sight which leads to a mysterious island where the secret is revealed. Atmospheric horror neo-classic has unforgettably chilling ending. Be wary of tapes given to you by strangers who have died recently.

See the Japanese version of this film before Hollywood bastardizes the shit out of it.
(oh wait they did and according to Insano Steve, the American version was better!)

Rating:





Ringu 2

Directed by Hideo Nakata

Insano Steve says: Sequel to the Ring explores more of the historical part of the urban legend. Better than the original in many ways, we see a new female investigator trying a bring an end to this curse once and for all. You'd think people would stop watching that tape after so many people died but there probably isn't a whole lot to watch on TV in Japan.

At least Japan is still making quality horror flicks unlike the films defecated out of Hollywood.

Rating:

1/2

The Trailer

Categories: japanese, japanese exploitation, japanese gore, japanese horror, the ring

Audition (Review)

Directed by Takashi Miike

Insano Steve says: Old widower decides he'd like to remarry now in his old age and has his friend (a movie producer) hold a bogus movie audition to find his perfect mate. Old guy finds woman of his dreams but low and behold, she's crazy. Very exciting ending and extremely well crafted thriller. Departure from the usual Miike insanity. Slow but worth the wait.
HIGHLY RECOMMENDED.

Rating:

The Trailer

Categories: audition, japanese, japanese atrocities, japanese exploitation, japanese gore, japanese horror, takashi miike

I'm not a Number!!! Mr. Horror Blogosphere Entry #3

I am proudly the 3rd entry in the Mr. Horror Blogosphere over @ Zombies Don't Run. I answered the questions to the best of my ability, but they were harder than a DMV driver's test.

Why no picture you might ask?

Well, I just forgot to send one. But more importantly, I'm going with the mysterious Ninja approach to the Mr. Horror Blogosphere. He's unseen, he's like a shadow...he's does not exist.

Hell, I'm not even writing this.

So check out my entry over at Zombie's Don't Run and remember...vote for the other guy!

Mr. Horror Blogosphere Entry #3: The Jaded Viewer!

Categories: horror blog, horror blogging, jadedviewer, jadedviewer.com, the jaded viewer

Quick Spinkick Reviews (from the jaded viewer archives)

I've got a back log of old reviews I've never posted, so I figure I'd post a few today and throughout the week. Most of these reviews are from Insano Steve and myself and from our old trading list circa 2002.

These were quick hit reviews, nothing fancy schmancy. No WTF moments or nudipedias. Just quick plot glimpses and funny randomness.

Enjoy!

Categories: horror trades, horror trading lists, jadedviewer, jadedviewer.com, the jaded viewer

Fudoh: The New Generation (Review)

Directed by Takashi Miike

Insano Steve says: Teenage Yakuza Riki Fudoh has his underage crime syndicate running like clockwork. His team features child assassins and women who shoot vaginal blowgun darts and the usual assortment of misfits. But to claim control of Kyushu island, he must off his father who is the leader of the controlling Yakuza. Fortunately, this can only be achieved violently with as much bloodshed as possible.

Based on a Manga. Gratuitous beheadings, acid burning and hermaphrodites (God bless those sexually gifted freaks) are always appreciated.

Rating:
The Trailer

Categories: horror trading lists, japanese, japanese exploitation, japanese horror, takashi miike

The Jaded Viewer spinkicks on to Facebook!

I've decided to put a corner of the jaded viewer on Facebook so you can get a decent feed while your Facebooking. So instead of checking your Blogger dash reading list, you can become a fan via Facebook.

I'll link all the newest stories I put up and it'll be a place to drop me a line if your so inclined (and if you hate captchas and don't wanna comment) I've put the little Facebook widget on the right nav bar as well.

So Become A Fan of the jaded viewer on Facebook!

Categories: horror blog, horror blogging, jadedviewer, jadedviewer.com, the jaded viewer