Black Dynamite (Anaconda Malt Liquor and Red Band Trailers)

"Anaconda Gives you "oooooooooooooooooo."I wanna soooooooo drink some Anaconda Malt Liquor. The only malt liquor approved by the United States government.Thanks to Twitch, we get to see this throwback TV spots. Check em out below. Black Dynamite has been selected to be part of the Sundance film festival so it probably will come out next year.Also check out the BD holiday greeting. HO!!! HO!!!! HO!!!!! And the NEW RED BAND NSFW...

Categories: Anaconda Malt Liquor, black dynamite, black dynamite red band trailer, black dynamite trailer, nsfw

Dance of the Dead (Review)

Dance of the Dead Dance of the Dead (2008)Directed by Gregg BishopYou know what we Americans do best? Make a frakin kick ass zombie film.Score another one for the US of A. USA! USA!Gregg Bishop's uber indie Dance of Dead rivals Shaun of the Dead's silliness, blends in some 80s Return of the Dead for the millienial age and clicks in some Buffy-logue to boot. It's amazing nobody ever thought to make Buffy but with zombies.It's a blender of geekiness...

Categories: dance of the dead, dance of the dead review, fast moving zombies, horror comedy

Gutterballs (Review)

GutterballsGutterballs (2008)Directed by Ryan NicholsonAfter watching Return to Sleepaway Camp, I decided to continue the trend of 80s slasher remakes and watched Gutterballs. Straight out the Canadian horror school of horror, it's like watching a hot, voluptuous big breasted blonde scratch a blackboard with Kreuger gloves while being decapitated.Translation: We got awesome nudity/sex, tons of gore and splatter but really annoying, obnoxious characters...

Categories: 80s horror, bowling, gutterballs, gutterballs review, gutterballs teaser trailer, gutterballs trailer, maniac, plot digger productions, slasher films, top horror movies of 2008

Return to Sleepaway Camp (Review)

Return to Sleepaway Camp Return to Sleepaway Camp (2008)Directed by Robert HiltzikHow do you create a sequel to a 80s slasher movie that actually sucked but is only remembered because of the ending?You know the one. The one with the girl penis and the gratuitous green tint.You create a horror time warp slasher flick with cheese. That's the best way to describe Return to Sleepaway Camp.It's a 21 st century Sleepaway but done in a throwback 80s sorta...

Categories: 80s slasher horror, felissa rose, return to sleepaway camp, return to sleepaway camp review, return to sleepaway camp trailer, slasher films, sleepaway camp, sleepaway camp ending

Happy Holidays from the jaded viewer!

Well I've got a lot of movies to review over the holiday break. Some very obscure horror, some mainstream and a few in between.So stay tuned for that.If your an aspiring filmmaker, indie marketing team or STV horror production company (ahem) or whatever and have anything you want me to review that you'd think would be a nice fit on the jaded viewer (and want some free publicity) drop me a line.And keep those comments coming. We're all one big horror family aren't we? Not like a real family because today your probably being driven nuts with distant...

Categories: happy holidays, jadedviewer, jadedviewer.com, silent night deadly night trailer, the jaded viewer

Mutants (Trailer)

The French are fuckin winning the unofficial horror war. Because I'm getting hyped for this shit. Is Mutants the next Inside or Martys or Ils?Check out the new trailer. ...

Categories: french horror, martys trailer, mutants, mutants trailer

The Hajirai Machine Girl (Trailer)

It seems as an extra in the Tokyo Shock DVD of The Machine Girl (which you can read my review here) we get an uber lower budget sequel to Noburu Iguchi's now cult classic, viral trailer splatterfestWho would have thought you could make a sequel to that insanity?Hajirai (or Shyness) Machine Girl seems more outrageous than its original parent. Arterial decaps, machine gun ass and Yakuza with nails in his head.Makes me think of the STV Ichi the Killer...

Categories: gore, Kataude mashin gâru, Noburu Iguchi, Revenge movie, splatter, the hajirai machine girl, the hajirai machine girl trailer, the machine girl, the machine girl review, tokyo shock

Perkins 14 (Trailer)

Perkins 14 is an example of fan created horror. Not really a first, but a rare occurence in this day and age.The film was developed by Massify.com. Writers submitted story ideas, audition tapes were uploaded and the cast and winning story were chosen.So their tagline that a film invented, written, cast, voted for, chosen and created by YOU, isn't that farfetched.Now part of the After Dark Horrorfest 2009 lineup we'll see if something created by US...

Categories: 8 films to die for, after dark horrorfest 2009, after dark horrorfest 3, autopsy, butterfly effect revelation, dying breed, faithless, from within, perkins 14, someone behind you, the broken, voices

the jaded viewer goes AWOL

Well you might be wondering WTF happened to the updates on the site. I had some personal stuff unexpectedly come up which took mega, major, uber priority.I'm back and with the holidays coming up, we might have a few gaps here and there.Think of this lapse like the end of the original Dawn of the Dead which you can see below. I'm like Peter, contemplating to go all suicidy but changing my mind at the last minute and going all heroic.I love the the GI Joe music as he kicks ass to Franince and the helicoptor.Imagine if they went with the original...

Categories: dawn of the dead ending, dawn of the dead final scene, jadedviewer, jadedviewer.com, the jaded viewer

Death Bell (Trailer)

Battle Royale meets 90210. It seems Korea is dismissing this Ringu shit and going in a whole new direction of after school horror.And so, they give birth to Go-Sa aka Death Bell.Here be the plot:The film is set in a high school, where an elite group of twenty students—including rebelious heroine Kang Yi-na, her timid best friend Yoon Myong-hyo, and her would-be boyfriend Kang Hyeon—are taking a special class for their college entrance exam. After...

Categories: battle royale, death bell, death bell trailer, high school horror, horror movies 2009, korean horror

Sick Girl (Trailer)

I remember watching the PSA teaser and trailer for Sick Girl and never got around to posting it. But after rewatching that PSA trailer, it's still fuckin morbidly hilarious.The sick girl in question is Izzy, a psychopathic, anti-Juno uber fucked up girl who likes torturing some innocents in the family barn.I can't do the plot justice so here it is in italic standard form.Sick Girl is the story of Izzy, a girl that wants to protect her little brother,...

Categories: juno, sick girl, sick girl psa trailer, sick girl trailer, sick teaser

The Last House in the Woods (Review)

The Last House in the Woods The Last House in the Woods (2006)aka Il Bosco FuoriDirected by Gabriele AlbanesiWhy can't it be the first house in the woods? How about the second to last house?Ahhh yes, those exploitation crazy Italians love rebooting the old grindhouse slashers flicks of old like it was the 70s and 80s.Can somebody tell them its the 21 st century?My first impression was it had the feel of the late great Bruno Mattei's cheesy, Ed Wood-ish...

Categories: 2008 horror dvd, exploitation, exploitation film, Il Bosco Fuori, The Last House in the Woods, The Last House in the Woods review

Dead Snow (Trailer)

I know I'm a little late on this one, but alas I've been hyping up Nazi zombies for some time here. Worst Case Scenario (a movie that seems like it will never be made) had an awesometastic trailer featuring underwater Nazi zombie ghouls.But Dead Snow, recently announced as part of the lineup for the Sundance Film Festival looks like it's going to be a a uber revolution of zombie horror.Nazis and zombies is a natural fit in the evil, fucked up sorta...

Categories: aquatic nazi ghouls, dead snow, dead snow trailer, dod sno, fast moving zombies, german zombies, nazi zombies, sundance 2009

Friday the 13th (Full Trailer and New Poster)

I wouldn't be a horror site if I didn't cover the big news of the day, right? So here's my obligatory post of the Friday the 13th remake, slated to be released on February 13th, 2009.Yahoo Movies got the jump yesterday and has the full trailer online. Check it out by going here.The new poster is also up as you can see above.I totally dig the new Jason Voorhees. He does look menacing and from the trailer seems a wee bit smarter than your average slasher...

Categories: final girl, friday the 13th, friday the 13th full trailer, friday the 13th poster, friday the 13th remake, friday the 13th remake trailer, gratuitous nudity, jason voohees, untitled friday the 13th

After Dark Horrorfest III: 2009 (Full Lineup and Trailers)

After Dark Horrorfest 2009 finally has a full lineup for the 8 movies to die for. I've seen a few of the past horrofest flicks in the theatre in 07 and 08. Some were damn good, some were fuckin horrible.It's scheduled from January 9th to January 15th, 2009.I've watched some of the trailers (when available and read the vague plot summaries) and below is my list of what I'm fuckin excited to see.1.) Perkins 14 (JUST REVIEWED!!! CLICK HERE FOR THE FULL REVIEW!!)Plot: Robert Perkins builds an army of 14 people brainwashed through cult-like methods...

Categories: 8 films to die for, after dark horrorfest 2009, after dark horrorfest 3, autopsy, butterfly effect revelation, dying breed, faithless, from within, perkins 14, someone behind you, the broken, voices

Eyeborgs (Trailer)

While your hoping for Danny Trejo to make Machete, where you CAN actually see him is in a new movie called Eyeborgs.I never thought they'd bring back the robot gadgets slasher flick back from its 80s grave, but anything is possible now.Here be the plot synopsis.After a terrorist attack on US soil, the government intensifies it's surveillance, installing a far reaching network of cameras called the ODIN (Optical Defense Intelligence Network) system....

Categories: adrian paul, cyborgs, danny trejo, eyeborgs, eyeborgs teaser, eyeborgs trailer, robocop, skynet, terminator the sarah connor chronicles

Dard Divorce (Review)

Dard DivorceDard Divorce (2007)Directed by Olaf IttenbachBefore Uwe Boll made the words German + Director + Movie = an untouchable, horrible combination, there were a few awesome German directors that revolutionized the gore/splatter films of the 80s and 90s.The trio of Jorg Buttgereit, Andreas Schnaas and Olaf Ittenbach were the masters of German horror.Buttgereit is now irrelevant, Schnaas is still around having teamed with Troma for Nikos the...

Categories: dard divorce, dard divorce review, dard divorce trailer, german horror, german splatter, gore, olaf ittenbach, splatter, splatter gore, underground splatter, uwe boll