Friday, April 02, 2010

Leftover Thoughts: Jaded Viewer Edition

Before I started the jaded viewer, I had a personal blog filled with my leftover thoughts. The blog was aptly titled leftoverthoughts. It was pure continuum of thought, just randomness, blurbs and mumbo jumbo. I figured I'd share the more movie and horror themed thoughts I posted on this now defunct site. Enjoy!

  • You know, its actually hard to speak like you're in the Buffyverse...I know this for a fact because I tend to skew my nouns into adjectives and verbs (and when you do this, you tend to create nouns that shouldn't be verbilized (see?))
  • When I was in college, I worked for a adult video store and sorta had the "8mm" type job. On a weird night where business was slow, 2 hot looking lesbians started to flirt with me and started to make out gratuitously right in front of my eyes, they started taking off their tight knit shirts...(or that could have been one of the many pornos I watched with my free rental employee perk)
  • One day I'm going to pretend I'm a vampire and go to sleep during the day and stay awake all night, I'll even pretend to imagine sunlight hurts me and I'm allergic to garlic and silver...and on that day, I will get hit by a speeding drunk driver who thinks he's a vampire slayer

  • Superman totally outsmarted General Zod in Superman 2. Fuck you Superman.

  • The one thing about living in New York is that you get to see the most disfigured people in the world. Not just people who have multiple eyes or have no ears but people who suffer from a disfiguring disease like that bumps disease. I recently passed a woman on the street where her entire right side of her face just drooped. It was like 2 feet of droopiness. Even the homeless couldn't stop looking at her.

  • Does anybody have a copy of the episode of Different Strokes when either the following happened?

    A.) Arnold gets molested/kidnapped
    B.) Kimberly gets molested/kidnapped
    C.) Sam gets molested/kidnapped
    D.) Willis smokes up joint
    E.) Arnold, Dudley, Kimberly, Willis and Sam get kidnapped, molested and smoke up a joint

  • When is the appropriate time to just go on a killing spree?

  • Remember when you discovered the Internet?
    The first time I used the Internet was to accomplish these 3 things.

    1.) Find Information
    Yup. Find information. What kind of info you ask? Who the fuck cares? I wanted to find out about anything. Cannibal movies, old 80's television shows, celebrity corpses, who invented toothpaste? Is my final exam tomorrow?

    2.) Porn
    "What the fuck is the Internet?" Of course. To share pornography with one another.
    Are you telling me I can see Jenny McCarthy naked...........for free? Yup. At one point in college I saw somebody put up crippled midget porn as wallpaper. No shame at all.

    3.) Mp3's
    Music, for free? God bless the Internet!! Thanks pre lawsuit Napster!

  • Porn is really repetitive.
That is all for now. Now that I think of it, leftover thoughts have evolved into leftover tweets. So if you want to hear more random leftover thoughts, follow me on Twitter @jadedviewer!


  1. This is brillant!! It's a shame that I can't get into Twitter despite, running the Twitter feed for Borders (Southampton) before we got closed down at Christmas, though by that point most of the Borders stores with Twitter feeds had decended into posts about biscuits, until we found out we were all being made unemployed and then the posts were mainly about what vultures the customers were and what cunts the management were! :)

    One of the things I remember most about discovering the internet, was how slow dial up was. Ahh memories of staying up all night and seeing maybe one naked times!

    Great post!

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