Monday, August 10, 2009

The Thread: What was the Worst of Freddy's demises?

Son of 1000 maniacs! Son of 1000 maniacs! Son of 1000 maniacs!

I think I may be the only one who's obsessed with the way slashers get killed at the end of the movie. Because the thing is, after the slasher goes through the motions of slaughtering young, helpless teenagers and getting everything thrown at him to stop his murderous rampage, sometimes the slasher's death becomes really anticlimactic (see the end of Friday the 13th Part VIII)

The one series I'm intrigued by the slasher's death is A Nightmare on Elm Street. Freddy's demise were kinda a letdown don't you think? Some kinda rocked. See my list below on how Freddy eventually "lost" to those damn kids.

What do you guys think? Which one was the worse?


1.) A Nightmare on Elm Street

How Freddy Dies:

The Jaded Viewer says: Freddy doesn't technically "die", more so gets defeated. Sure he gets set on fire and gets boobied into traps. Hell, I'll give Nancy credit for figuring out how to kill Kreuger but really he just vortexed into the bed. For being a really damn scary flick, Freddy's defeat was kinda lame.

2.) A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge

How Freddy Dies:

The Jaded Viewer says: One of my least favorite NOES. It's the old love conquers all cliche! For a sequel, you'd think this would be better or equal to the original. Freddy's death was like a "You killed me with love, but I'm taking him with me" cliched ending.

Love 1 Freddy 0.

3.) A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors

How Freddy Dies:

The Jaded Viewer says: One of the best in the series. And the fuckin twist of Nancy FINALLY getting killed by Freddy. But that's not what we're talking about. We're talking about how Freddy dies because of get this...holy water (Freddy even pokes fun at how they've tried to kill him in Part 6). Also, Nancy stabs Freddy with his own glove. Later, Freddy's bones are thrown in a grave and he's ultimately "killed" when a crucifix is placed on his skull.

I gotta agree with Freddy on this one. Holy water?!? How can one even take that attempt seriously? And death by burial of bones was another letdown in the series.

4.) A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: The Dream Master

How Freddy Dies:

The Jaded Viewer says: Well they just stole this shit from Thundercats. I call Freddy's death in Dream Master the Mumm-ra death because he sees a reflection of himself and that's what causes the "souls" little hands to rip him apart. Freddy's death scene is gory and gooey which is a plus. This cause of death is a total deus ex machina, because after holy water, they couldn't think of anything that could really kill him.

5.) A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child

How Freddy Dies:

The Jaded Viewer says: Well in this one they we're still running on empty on how to kill Freddy. First they have Jacob (Alice's unborn son) turn on him then the souls get all angry and turn him into a deformed infant which his mommy absorbs into her uterus or some shit. It's just utterly dumb. It doesn't make sense and nobody ever learned from Nancy how to kill him. At this point, they were just improvising Freddy's demise. Good lord, WTF.

6.) Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare

How Freddy Dies:

The Jaded Viewer says: Supposed daughter of Freddy comes back to defeat him. Kudos for using Nancy's methods to bring him into the real world but the big, climactic battle we thought we'd see is non existent. C'mon she turned into a professional knife thrower? Then she uses the glove to gut poor Kreuger and here's the kicker, stabs some dynamite and blows the shit out of him in 3D (thus releasing the supposed dream demons). I guess symbolically we have to say this was the death of funny/comedic Freddy.

I mean his last words are "Kids".

7.) Wes Craven's A New Nightmare

How Freddy Dies:

The Jaded Viewer says: We're suppose to have serious Freddy back but in the final scene with Heather L. and her fictional son, he goes all big mouth, tongue waggy and then gets trapped in a furnace (see the irony!) and burned which morphs him into a bug eyed demon.

We can thank Wes Craven for making New Nightmare self aware or have a movie cliches within a movie (which led him to the Scream franchise).

But Freddy's death (this being his last film where HE is the main slasher) is very dark and stylish but lacks in the POW death scene. Rest in Hell Freddy Kreuger.

8.) Freddy vs Jason

How Freddy Dies:

I'm not even putting this one up as we all know this ended in a stalemate and he winks and shit.

So what was the worse Freddy death scene in the series? Go ahead and comment and let me know what's the what.

As a bonus, below are the little cliffhangers at the end of each of the films. Which one was the best?

1.) NOES: Freddy possesses the car, then grabs mom through the window
2.) NOES 2: The speeding bus, Freddy's glove bursts out
3.) NOES 3: Toy house lights up
4.) NOES 4: Freddy image in the fountain
5.) NOES 5: The kids jump roping and singing the song
6.) FT13th 9: Freddy's glove grabs Jason's mask
7.) FvJ: Freddy winks

Vote! Leave comments. Write thoughts about the pending remake. I hope this was horror-cational for you noobs.

1 comment:

  1. Unmistakably the first death, it just perfectly adheres to the theme of the first film and is completely genius. It is also the death I would have liked to see in New Nightmare. Great thread JV!