Wednesday, May 02, 2012

Film School 101: Analyzing a film student's vintage 90s short film

When you start working at a new job, you have no idea who your new coworkers are. They could be vigilante's at night for all you know or weekend serial killers. But the more I learned about my new coworker, the more things start being revealed. So one day during an early morning case of slacking he revealed he was an actor in a short film while in college. Having directed me to the YouTube link, I got to watch this entire short while eating a delicious salad. In what may have been the best lunch time viewing since I started this job, I witnessed a short film that had me on the fuckin floor.

Yes fellow jaded viewers, it's called "A Fall from Grace". And it's so horribly bad that it's fuckin awesome. It makes The Room look like Citizen Kane. It makes Birdemic look like The Birds. This short has elements of all that is perfect in this millennial age. It's vintage 90s (or it maybe circa early 2000s I actually have no idea so I'm gonna say late 90s), its made my college film students and it utilizes the now archaic Internet communication of the time (it's AOL Instant Messenger!).

Now you to can witness this masterpiece of cinema and get those warm nostalgia fuzzies of 90s filmmaking. I too participated in a few college produced horror shorts when I was at school and I have no idea what's happened to the footage. But my coworker has his live on YouTube, where I will help to make it go viral and establish it as the next found footage brilliance. Is this the next Tommy Wiseau Room-ish cult phenomenon?

You decide. Check out my analysis while you watch. Enjoy.

 


 
 

Here is a running log of my thoughts.
0:01: Cue 90s soundtrack
1:30: It's the establishing shot footage. Vintage Kevin Smith filmmaking!
1:55: It's random slo mo effects!
2:05: Note to self. Be careful of random guy asking to sit next to you in a room full of empty seats.
2:20: Dan and Ned are going to be BFFs 4 life......
2:28: Ummm that's some weird shit to say 5 seconds into meeting his new friend.
2:45: The dialogue here is absolutely brilliant. What kind of man are you? Huh Ned? Fuckin pussy Ned.
2:52: Screename!
2:59: Look at that face. Would you trust that guy?
3:43: Beware of screenames that start with "Cute". They be "spam bots".
3:45: Cue Green Day....
3:50: IM-ing was the Facebook of the 90s. I remember I would have warn wars with my friends back in the dot com days. Ring!
4:08: There is nothing that compares to the action scenes of somebody typing on screen and IM-ing somebody. Fuckin exciting!
4:28: That laptop had 128 MB of RAM and a a Pentium II processor. It's like it's from the future.
4:45: Random Kinkos product placement!
5:00: Best line of the short: "Don't fuck this up" God bless Dan and is overall douchebaginess.
5:22: Oh damn did somebody just fuck up? 
5:25: There is nothing wrong with one dude giving another dude a card. Remember this was the 90s.
6:28: 90s sped up date montage! You can smell the awkwardness!
6:45: You know what's fun for a first date? Sliding on ice and almost cracking your skull.
7:37: In the 90s, you didn't go eat when you went on a date.
7:47: A kiss on the cheek was like 3rd base in the 90s.
8:13: OH SHIT!!! MOTHERFUCKIN TWIST!
8:40: Ominous note footage equals you got played Ned.
9:15: Oh here we go again. Damn you Dan/Mike!

So what did you think? My coworker tells me he was in more shorts so the search continues to find them.
This is the funniest "it's so bad, it's good" shorts I've seen in a while. It must be enjoyed by all. 

Damn you Dan! Damn you!


1 comment:

  1. Gotta love that Phil Collins breakdown when the shit hit the fan.

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