Sunday, July 27, 2008

Insanitarium (Review)


Insanitarium (2008)

Directed by Jeff Buhler

Here's the plot for Insanitarium:

Jack plays a man who pretends to be crazy in order to save his sister from being involuntarily hospitalized. Once inside the institute, the siblings discover that a doctor is using his patients like lab rats, forcing them to take a drug that turns them into flesh-eating psychopaths.

Is this the best idea Jack could come up with to free his sister?

I don't know who Jesse Metcalf is. Something with Desperate Housewives I think. Fuck if I care. It's the "special guest stars" that made me chuckle.

Quark aka Armin Shimerman plays a mental patient. Olivia Munn (from G4's Attack of the Show) plays a nurse. Kiele Sanchez (who was on a few episodes of Lost) played Jack's sister Lily. and Peter Stormare (of Fargo fame) plays the mad doctor.

With all these "Hey It's That Guy or Girl" actors, Insanitarium is just a horror film in an insane asylum.

But with extra crunchy flesh eating zombies (I hesitate to call them zombies as they aren't dead).

Awesome Review-O-Matic

So as the plot illustrates, Jack poses a crazy guy to free his sister. He meets the doctor (Peter Stormare) who has been testing a drug called Orpheum to cure his patients but instead makes them more crazier and more hungry for human flesh.

Jack, with the help of Dave (another patient) and a nurse Nancy (Olivia Munn) help free Jack's sister and try to escape the asylum. They run alot. Barricading doors, fighting off the loonies flesh eaters with electro sticks and knives and such. Inevitably they face off against the mad doctor and the ending is as expected. Your typical open ended ending with a dash of "look we may have a sequel if this movie gets good DVD sales".

First of all, let me say that for an insane asylum...ahem oh sorry...I mean mental institution, they've got some hot patients and staff. Serously? Olivia Munn? Kiele Sanchez? Hot naked nymphomaniac. Please, I'd like to check into this place.

Second of all, are all the mental this crazy? Like moaning and groaning and walking like zombies fucked up? But then you have the fully functioning crazy people who seem quite normal. I'm no expert but this seems to be a little unbalanced (pun so intended).

I can see where Jeff Buhler was trying to go with Insanitarium. He wanted to use the exterior of the asylum to catapult a slash and dash zombie film. But thats the thing. Asylums have already been done to death. Sometimes we like to see our zombies in a mall. Or on Army base. Or in Vegas. Or in London. Or in Pittsburgh. Or in a quarantined apartment building.

An asylum is just....well boring. Flesh eating wackos are not new. And this is where Insanitarium lacks energy. There were some good splatter-ific moments but for 88 minutes, I was left waiting for those moments. I think I counted maybe 2 total.

So what can I say? If you like seeing people chased by cannibal crazies for an hour and a half is your thing, see Insanitarium. But then again, I might say your crazy.


Evil Dead
Romero's Dead series
Every other zombie film


Gun shots
Knife stabbing
Intestine eating
Arm trauma
Knife through the mouth (x2!!!)
Penis munching
Ice Pick eye trauma
Blood covered walls
Limbs and arms pieces


Hot,blonde naked mental patient chases our heroes...well naked

WTF moment

"Holy shit? Is that Quark???"

-the jaded viewer upon seeing Armin Shimerman in the movie

"Holy shit? Isn't that the girl from Attack of the Show?"

-the jaded viewer upon seeing Olivia Munn in the movie

The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis

Let's just say, if you want to see some crazy people get chased by crazy blood thirsty killers, see The Signal instead.

Jeff Buhler wrote the screenplay for Midnight Meat Train. Hopefully that flick will be awesome-rific and whatever Buhler follows up with will be much better.

But if you wanna see Olivia Munn and Quark, play a nurse and an insane killer...then see this. And then check your self into mental ward.


The Trailer

, , , , , , , , , , , ,


Post a Comment