The logo of this blog will always be loved here at the jaded viewer. And as such, I've always kept you up to date on what's been going on with our favorite Belgian action star. From his last movie, Assassination Games (see review here) to his reality show, I'm always keeping tabs on the Muscles from Brussels. So having discovered the trailer for his latest movie (nope not The Expendables 2) I figured you all needed to know what's the what with JCVD.
Here is the trailer for Dragon Eyes which also stars world class martial artist Cung Lee. Seems JCVD is making Cung Lee do all the work as he plays mentor Tiano. Here be the plot:
In St. Jude, drug dealers and corrupt cops have destroyed an urban neighborhood. But newcomer, Hong, has the fighting skills and moral vision to save this town from itself.
As we all wait for The Expendables 2 (oddly JCVD plays "Jean Vilain") Really? How original! He's got a few other films lined up. "Welcome to the Jungle" is a comedy starring his two kids (yup they're back) and he sports one hell of a porno-ey mustache.
Jean Claude says Hi from Puerto Rico.
And his final film is completely out of left field. We got into sci fi territory and he will be in a movie called U.F.O. Here be the plot.
Five young people realise one fine morning they are robbed of functioning mobile phones, radio and electricity. While they try to escape this situation on foot, they happen to see a huge flying saucer. Soon the civilisation as we know it starts to break down and the five friends find themselves in the middle of an anarchic turmoil.
You gotta admit, he's really hitting all the different genres and it all might turn out to be awesome. If I get to see a spinkick, that'll make my day.
@TheRaidUS is the equivalent of seeing a 100 car pile up, head on collisions and fiery mushroom cloud explosions. It's fuckin awesome
It's rare to see an action movie that says, fuck the characters and the plot! We're not going to waste time developing our characters or explaining the plot. Instead, we're going to give you non stop action for well over 100 minutes and it's going to be some of the most insane stuff you have seen in a while.
Remember when you first mesmerized by Tony Jaa in Ong Bak? Well The Raid is Ong Bak on fuckin steroids and fully armed with nuclear explosives. It's bar none the best action movie I've seen in the past decade.
Boring Plot-O-Matic
The plot is simple. SWAT Team are told they have to take out a ruthless crime lord in an old tenement building. The building is heavily guarded by 1-800 Henchmen and house lowlifes, thugs, addicts and pieces of shit. It also has a few good Samaritans who our remaining cops will meet later. All you need to know is humans with lady parts are at a minimum. You're going to see glorious violence in a Just Dance choreography that is pure awesomeness.
Awesome Review-O-Matic I said it would revolutionize the action movie and I wasn't wrong. You may not know the name Iko Uwais but you will after seeing The Raid. Move over Tony Jaa, your 15 minutes are up. I first saw Uwais in Merantau, Gareth Evans first flick featuring Silat Harimau the Indonesian martial art. I'll admit, it had some stellar action scenes but it was full of boring drab plot and story and had staged action scenes that seem to appear out of nowhere.
But The Raid is floor after floor of non stop Silat in closed quarters, rooms with many breakable objects and ferocity of throwing your enemy against the wall numerous times. Uwais is a skilled tactician playing our hero cop and the synchronized ballet of Silat on Silat violence via endless henchmen are a sight you won't fuckin forget.
The man who steals the show however is Yayan Ruhian who plays Mad Dog. Dude is like the Nate Robinson of the film. He's barely 5'8 from the looks of it but his Silat skills are fuckin stellar. In the penultimate scene, he battles Uwais and his "partner" in well over 15 minutes display of kicks, blocks, punches, blocks and gallery of lightning quick Silat-o-pedia of moves.
And don't get me started by the point blank violence. Holy fuckin shit. Here are things I've never seen before:
Execution of 4 men via point blank gunshots to the head (and one via hammer)
Silat battle ending in multiple gunshots to the face
Machete wielding fight scene
Rude Awakening neck breakers
I mean check this scene out.
This is a badass flick that destroys all semblance of what action porn should be. It defies the genre by be unrelenting and ferocious. It doesn't apologize, it says FUCK YOU and gives you more of what you want. It has moments of pure suspense and anxiety then delivers one screaming kick after the other.
The Raid Redemption is the one action movie you need to see this year. Gone is Thai action. Indonesia is the king of action and Gareth Evans and Iko Uwais are sitting on the throne.
Nude-ipedia
Puhlease.
Gore-ipedia
Mucho gun trauma Mucho broken bones trauma Mucho head, arms, legs trauma WTF moment
Uwais takes on EVERYBODY!!!!
The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis
The Raid is out now in limited theaters. It's a must see, no ifs or ands about it. It's the pinnacle of the modern day action flick. It's why it's getting a release here. The Raid may have been overshadowed by that movie with kids killing kids, but leave it up to the adults to give us grown up violence.
[this review brought to you by guest writer Camiele White who was a former apprentice of Beatrix Kiddo]
After 20 years of consciously watching film (the first five don’t count, for obvious reasons), my favourite films seem to always be Martial Arts related. When my brother came to me with a film he dubbed “the greatest action film of all time”, I had my doubts, particularly because I hadn’t seen a large variety of action films that were both adrenaline pumping and artistic works of brilliance. However, my brother has yet to steer me wrong, so I gave it a chance. It was the moment I welcomed Ip Man into my life.
After having seen the first film, I was thirsty, no RAVENOUS for more! Without becoming overcome with emotion, I’ll simply say Ip Man 2 didn’t fail to deliver. It was one of those films that you see once in your life, once in an existential dilemma about the worth of your own life --yeah, it was that deep for me.
Barring my overdramatic infatuation with the film, it actually opened my eyes to a universal truth --Americans don’t know shit! I consider myself incredibly open-minded. That being said, there’s so much about Asian cinema that I’m missing that it’s almost embarrassing. That point was driven home with a stake the size of Montreal when I had the pleasure of experiencing the Ip Man series for the first time. Ip Man tells the story of the legendary Yip Man, known commonly as Ip Man, one of the most venerated masters of Chinese Martial Arts and the undisputed master of Wing Chun. Most renowned for becoming the teacher of, arguably, the greatest Chinese martial artist of all time, Bruce Lee, Ip Man was a quiet nobleman who had a keen and organic understanding of the movement of the human body. The first film shows his struggle to effectively carry an entire nation on his shoulders during the second Sino-Japanese War. As with most films based on historical fact, the directors take a few liberties with the facts in order to heighten the dramatic effect; however, those moments are few and far between. What I experienced was nothing short of miraculous.
Ip Man 2 picks up where its predecessor left of: after winning a battle against Miura (portrayed by Ikeuchi Hiroyuki), a ruthless Japanese general and respectable martial artist in his own right, Ip Man is shot by a shady lieutenant with a sizeable chip on his shoulders who spits on the self-respect and tradition of the Chinese folk (let’s just say the man had one hell of a Napoleon Complex). After his shooting, the Chinese people, who are barricaded behind wooden spiked fences, force their way through and help Ip Man and his family escape their home of Foshan.
In the opening scene, we see Ip Man, portrayed by the highly underrated (and the second most incredible Chinese actor I’ve ever seen), Donnie Yen, attempting to find a place to open his Martial Arts school. He finds an abandoned roof annexed to a plant nursery, used solely to hang laundry. As is the case in many traditional Martial Arts films, a cocky young challenger waltzes through the doors to flex his muscle and see what all the fuss is about this Ip Man. Boy, did he learn a thing or twelve. Without blinking an eye, Master Ip devours this man with all the grace and poise of an elegant dancer. Thus setting the pace for the rest of the film.
On top of all the craziness surrounding the territorial nature of Martial Arts, Master Ip’s wife, Cheung Wing-sing (played by the ever-gorgeous Lynn Hung) is pregnant with another child and trying her best to save as much money as possible as her husband waits for students. Then when the British Invasion hits the Chinese shores, all hell breaks loose.
As tends to be the trend, the Brits have an itching for some Imperialism and decide to spread their European power to China. With a snarky (and poorly acted) British event promoter exploiting the beauty of Chinese Martial Arts to make some quick cash, the film alludes early on to an imminent clash between a British boxer and Master Ip. The fight is, of course, set up with an early casualty of nationalism --Master Hung, a renowned teacher of Hung Gar. He’s killed by the British boxing star, Taylor “The Twister” Milos, when Master Hung becomes outraged with his blatant insults of Chinese culture and challenges him in the ring.
Vengeance and national honour is on the line as Master Ip prepares to fight Twister and obliterate the misconception of most of the Western world of the 50s that Chinese culture is a commodity in place to entertain the masses.
As the plot twists and escalates in overt social commentary, two aspects that always remain effortless are the dramatic poise and natural beauty of the surroundings. The film is a testament to the grace inherent in true Martial Arts. It’s a film that’s completely full of pride and dignity. As with the other films that fill the top spots of my all time favourites, Ip Man and Ip Man 2 are true cinematic marvels that have enough action to keep one riveted, but is never crass or over the top, simply dramatic and sophisticated, portraying true life at its most intense.
Camiele White suffers from too much film information. In order to remedy her psychosis she’s decided to write about it. Right now, she’s trying something a bit different and writes about Theatrical Costumes. If you want to engage in a little conversation (at your own risk) she can be reached at cmlewhite at gmail [dot] com.
You'd think having a rapper in your movie would turn out to be a big FAIL. Somtimes that's not the case. That's because your not watching the right rappers in the right movies, you know what I'm saying? Insano Steve already detailed how awesome Stickey Fingaz hip hop musical A Day in the Life was. Even I was blown away by the cleverlogue of seeing Stickey, Omar and WeeBey from the Wire, Michael Rappaport, Caine from Menace II Society and Treach (from Naughty by Nature).
So thank the hip hop gods, Stickey Fingaz made another musical. This one is called Caught on Tape and it looks fuckin awesome. And whose in this one you asking? OMG, look at this lineup motherfucka. Vivica Fox and Cedric the Entertainer are the notables in this one with Sticky.
Bust a cap and watch the trailer below.
Straght out of Shaolin (aka Staten Island) comes The RZA's Wu Tang vs. The Golden Phoenix trailer (news via FilmDrunk). The RZA, musical genius and founding member of the infamous Wu Tang Clan goes all homagy to all the old Chinese king fu flicks of old.
This fucker has got serious street cred my brothas. Jackie Chan's stunt team, Fight choreographer Robert Tai of 5 Deadly Venoms,members of the USA Shaolin Team, and starring Shaw Bros. Legend Chi Kuan Chun and Dr. King Ogun Ali Muhammad, founder of the Universal African Fighting System.
And it wouldn't be Wu Tang without 5th generation Shaolin disciple The RZA. It's got serious kung fu-ery and all sorts of insane action.
HaaaaaaaaYaaaaaaaaaa. Check out the trailer.
Have I changed your perception of the rapper turned filmmaker stereotype? Hahaha. Maybe not but what do you think of these flicks?
After bringing you all a list of 5 supernatural TV shows you may have forgotten, I've come up with more TV shows that I used to watch back in the day. Some are from years back, others are from the 90s. Mind you, back in the 90s, cable wasn't the way it is now and only a few channels were standard back in the day.
Much of the exotic TV came in the form of syndicated shows and basically Fox putting anything on broadcast TV.
In any case, these are some shows I decided to follow because either they had a hot actress, involved some sci fi element and had kung fu. Ahhhh thank you You Tube for letting me time travel back to these awesome days of the toob. 5.) The Adventures of Brisco County Jr.
Network: Fox/Syndicated (1994)
the jaded viewer says: The thing about Bruce Campbell is that after seeing Evil Dead, you became a fan of anything he was in. Bruce is in a TV show? I'm so gonna watch it. It's a western with sci-fi elements and its oddly bonkers. I know Brisco fans became Jack of all Trade fans. C'mon admit it.
the jaded viewer says: My main man Russel Wong's second show that 's on this list (I watched any show that had Asians in it because American TV doesn't have Asians in it). I think they axed this show mid 2nd episode. Show was about some wrongly imprisoned Chinese martial artist who opens up a school in San Francisco. His students included Ray J, Missy Peregrym, Sarah Carter and Mako. Stereotypes galore in this one (because we all know every Chinese man, woman and child knows kung fu)
the jaded viewer says: OK ok, as part of Universal TV's Action Pack series, I didn't watch Cleopatra 2525 for the acting, story or special effects. I watched it for the very revealing outfits, especially the ones worn by our ditzy blonde lead Cleo (played by the hot Jennifer Sky). It's so silly sci-fi about armed flying machines versus kick ass girls you'd really don't mind the cheesiness when Gina Torres and Victoria Pratt are blasting bad guys and machines in tight leather.
the jaded viewer says: I'll admit, I'm a time travel junkie. If it be Quantum Leap or a BTTF cartoon, I'm watching it. So a little show about a cop from the future traveling to the past to catch bad guys is MUST SEE TV for me. He had an AI disguised as a credit card!
the jaded viewer says: Another TV show that was part of Universal TV's Action Pack series and starring Russell Wong. Seriously, it had an Asian male as the lead and getting "action" from all sorts of yummy ladies. Basically Vanishing Son started off as 4 made to TV movies about 2 brothers who come from war ravaged China to start anew (thank goodness they didn't end up in Arizona). But racist bad guys are everywhere so Jian-Wa has to kick ass to protect the innocent. Yes, this is the TV movies that had Rebecca Gayheart in them playing Jian-Wa's girlfriend. This show made it possible for Asian guys to date white women.
Let's get this out of the way first. This is a pseudo sequel to the smash and bash that is Ong Bak. Got that?
Let's also get this out of the way too.
Thailand is still the king of action cinema for now. Stunt-a-palooza, muy thai kneeing and elbowing and just rampant 1-2-3 punches. Sick shit all around.
I'm not a big fan of period piece action cinema. Whenever some Chinese or Japanese movie is set in the past, I get bored. I like my action in the present day, where stunts are performed in an urban setting, parkour becomes commonplace and a final scene can play out on the side of a fuckin building.
So you can see my dilemma after having watched Ong Bak 2?
The simple review is this. The historical ploppity plot is a yawn but the stunts and the actionography is fuckin fantastic and the stunts as always are awesome the magnificent.
You still want a review.....arghhh ok. Boring Plot-O-Matic
Set in the regal times of King Naresuan, Tien (Tony Jaa) is a man who was born into nobility but had it stripped from him after his parents were brutally murdered. During his childhood Tien learned Khon, a form of dance which is usually reserved for royalty. Although he didn't know it yet, Khon would later prove to be an invaluable aide to him. After seeing his parents murdered at the tender age of 10, Tien is forced to live on the streets where he is eventually captured by a group of thieves who take him in and teach him how to steal and fight.
Tien's expertise as a thief and fighter grows and it isn't long before he is made head thief. Then Tien sees something that makes his stomach churn. A competition is being held to find the best knights to serve under the very man who had killed Tien's parents all those years ago. Tien passes the tests easily and is made Lord Rachasana's 2nd Knight. Now, he has his opportunity to strike but he will have to use all his skill and ingenuity if he is going to get his revenge on the man who killed his parents.
Awesome Review-O-Matic
Read the plot above because I'm not going to talk about it anymore. Let's get to the action scenes shall we?
1.) Random medieval army vs army carnage
Slyly put into the sword on sword and bow and arrow battles is CGI blood. You know the one...that fake "300" CGI blood. I do not like this and there was way too much of it during the fight scenes.
However, good crazy choreographed action-rama when 2 battle armies go mano y mano is never a bore.
2.) The Elephant Scene
Tony Jaa has always tried to top his stunts and in this one he balances off a pack of wild rampaging elephants than does a sick backwards flip off its trunk. Totally sick...very nice.
3.) The training montage plus SAT Pirate tests scene
Jaa has to pass 3 tests to become the man of the pirates gang.
a.) Beat some schmuck with a sword b.) Beat some schmuck with his muy thai c.) Beat some schmuck with everything he's got in his arsenal
Suffice it to say he does.
4.) Tien's Uber Revenge Scene
Jaa's is in full revenge mode using Pacquiao like speed and lightning quick martially arts to dispense of the people who fucked up his village. Tons of different weapons are used, crazy numchucks, swords, that rope with the rock at the end of it (what's that called?) and plain old bare fists and legs.
The scene blows by so quickly if you blink you may have missed something unfuckinbelievable.
5.) The Ending is 20 -30 minutes of action porn
Seriously...its like he exploded and went completely nuts. Jaa has all the cylinders working. Guys are coming at him left and right and he's disposing of them like he's blowing his nose. It's Jaa vs an army of 300. Slice and dice, punch and crunch. Jaa is kicking ass so fast its a ballet of brutality. A battle on top of an elephant made my mouth stay open for a good 10 seconds.
It's great choreographed insanity and it's pretty fun to watch.
The ending leaves a soon to be sequel ready to be filmed. All in all, a good solid flick. Though it didn't have the magic of the first Ong Bak. The original had humor, a very funny motivational plot device and muy thai-ing that went off the radar.
Ong Bak 2 had none of that. But that's ok. It's like getting psyched up for your favorite dish and it not living up to your expectations. But it's still satisfying.
Gore-ipedia/Nude-ipedia
Nada. More like one big sausage factory but with flying spinkicks.
WTF moment That crazy elephant back flick
The Jaded Viewer's Final Prognosis
Ong Bak 3 was greenlit and its suppose to start filming at the end of this year. Hollywood has been itching to get Tony Jaa to Hollywood. Please don't stick him in a buddy cop movie...fuckin Hollycrap.
Ong Bak 2 is your fix for all that is the uber martial arts action genre has to offer. If you can keep awake during the pointless plot pushing the action scenes do not disappoint.
Somehow they need to tie this flick and part 3 to the original. Maybe that head in the first movie is Tien's head.
Yeah that make sense. Hmm maybe not. Oh fuck it. Just knee kick somebody in the head please.
Jean Claude says Hi from Puerto Rico.
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