Showing posts with label megan fox. Show all posts
Showing posts with label megan fox. Show all posts

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

The WTF List: Jennifer's Body

Well everybody has done regular reviews, screencap reviews, quotey quotable reviews of Jennifer's Body. But nobody has done a trademarked jaded viewer WTF List of this movie.

Honest to blog, thank the cheesy fries for me.

So here is The WTF List: Jennifer's Body Edition. Beware, I'm going all Buffy comparison in this list.

1.) OK, let's get it outta the way. She may look whorey, but Megan Fox is fuckin hot
2.) This movie is like an episode of Buffy. I mean they could be in Sunnydale and it totally feels the same way. Needy is Willow, Chip is Oz and Jennifer is a Cordelia/Buffy hybrid.
3.) Looking beyond her character, Amanda Seyfried is waaay hot too. Just had to get that outta the way
4.) Low Shoulder ain't no Dingoes Ate my Baby

5.) OK I chuckled during that "It's true. It's on Wikipedia" line
6.) OMG that's fuckin Screeching Weasel. Damn you Diablo Cody!!!!
7.) Victim #1 was a jock douchebag (yay), Victim #2 is a Hot Topic addict (double yay)
8.) How many people from Juno are in this?
9.) It's like Teeth but without the mutant hoohaa
10.) Gratuitous use of an homage to Evil Dead via a t-shirt
11.) Hot lesbian scene is super stimulating on a intellectual basis....ok I'll be right back.
12.) Back......wait not done yet. Now I'm back.
13.) The female natural cycle to sexual innuendo ratio is like 2:1.
14.) Really? Satanic rituals and succubi. You gotta love 3rd grade level horror.
15.) The big final fight scene was all tampons and eating disorder talk. Funny one liners should have lead to chick on chick violence.
16.) OK the chick on chick violence was horribly boring
17.) That ending was on Season 3, Episode 12...aspect of the demon. OMG, did Diablo Cody just watch all of Buffy to write this shit?
18.) Gratuitous use of Lance Henrickson....why I ask you why?
19.) The waterfall thing is kinda cool
20.) OK, now lets talk about the dialogue. Sure I know its too overly clever but the Diablo Cody speak is exactly the same as Whedon-logue. So I'm not going to say that the movie is bad because of this.

I like how the dialogue is populated with pop culture references, Internet lingo and cleverly cleverisms. Because I mean look how I write for blog's sake. I'm a true Whedon disciple and every since, I've started blogging and talking this way. I think it might be a severe disorder that I will have a press conference about one day.

In any case, final thoughts on Buffy's Body. The movie is heightened Diablo Cody for the prepackaged, T-Mobile Sidekick text happy MTV crowd. I liked it in that mindless horror mainstreaminess sorta way. We got cock teased with Megan Fox partial nudity, thought we'd get some decent monsters slaying and it promoted the soundtrack as best it could. Here's the simple calculus.

Cleverlogue + Megan Fox + demonology + tongue on tongue happy = Yay!

It's a horror comedy with LOLs and OMGs and FTWs. Sit back, relax and eat some green M&M's. You get 2 spinkicks Jennifer's Body.

You happy?

Rating:

Friday, September 04, 2009

The Horrror Continuum (Bored Edition)



It's always nice to start the 3 day weekend with a picture of Ms. Megan Fox. Admit it.
You're going to see Jennifer's Body. Not because of Diablo Cody and her Whedonesque like dialtribes, or because it's threatening to have gore and demon splatter. But Megan Fox gets naked in it.

C'mon now. We're paying $10-12 to see some top notch, grade boobage.

Same thing with Sorority Row. That story is utter crap but just the hint of nudity will get the jabronis and tweens into the megaplexes.

And did you see that Whiteout trailer with Kate Beckinsale? I definitely saw Kate Beckinsale in a gratuitous naked shower scene...in Antartica?

Face it. Sex sells and hell I'll pin up Fairuza Balk pictures as I please.

On to the continuum!

On the last episode of the jaded viewer....

Assassins vs Assassins vs a priest!

Lindy Booth is hawt! Check out the clip below from Wrong Turn where umm well she kinda dies.





5 Horror Movies that warped my fragile little mind

Insano Steve wants to here your fuckin opinion about his Top 10 Black Films of the 1990s!

..and finally all you need to do is a pick a number from 1 to 500 and you could win Final Destination 3!!!

The interweb.....

I found this Rue Morgue list of the supposed The Top 150 Most Violent Movies Ever!

10 Coolest Tarantino characters...really?

The guys who made Crank made Gamer...

I have a few more but I'm getting bored and tired. Got any good links? Comment and share with everyone.

Enjoy the 3 day weekend!

Friday, August 14, 2009

The Horror Continuum (Video Edition)

It's been a while since I put up a Horror Continuum post. I just haven't had time to search for links to keep you updated on what's the what in the horrorverse.

So as it's Friday and we all want to be in a good mood for the weekend, today's edition is all videos. So below you will find some classic horror spoofs, parodies and other viral vids from the interweb. Enjoy!

The uber hot Megan Fox has a special PSA for high schoolers....




EMBED-Megan Fox Public Service Announcement - Watch more free videos


The Ballad of G.I. Joe (if you missed it the first time around)





Friday the 12th





Freddy Krueger: The True Hollywood Story





Jason Voorhees talks about his community





Pinhead's New Look





If you have any links to other funny horror related videos, share them with everyone. After another work week, we all need some ha ha's as we head to the weekend. Put em in the comments and share. Because sharing is caring.