It's all about the Van Damme. Insano Steve and I saw The Expendables 2 first day it came out and clearly I was here for the Van Damme show. I openly rooted for Jean Claude. When he first came on screen, I applauded and howled my ass off. Oh man did he try to act. Some monologue about respect, uranium and fighting like a man.
The other jabronis gave a big cheer to that punk Texas Ranger. I was spinkicking my way to happiness when Jean Villain made his appearance on the screen. The Expendables 2 is more of the same old murder death kills by our gang of happy go lucky mercenaries but what part 1 lacked in a bad guy is made up into pure unadulterated awesomeness with Van Damme.
Onto the WTF List (pretty much Jean Claude edition)
1.) They kill all of Mongolia
2.) Cue Arnold cameo
3.) Cue Bruce cameo
4.) Holy shit, JCVD's got his own Bulgarian gang!
5.) Have you noticed all action movies now are filmed in Bulgaria? Bulgaria, where life is cheap, sets can be built by slave labor and the extras playing soldiers actually died while filming
6.) Scott Adkins is now forever is JCVD's action BFF
7.) OMG...yeah you saw JCVD spinkick a knife into Chris Hemsworth!!! Fuck yeah!
8.) Van Damme's acting is like hearing two squirrels fuck. It's horrible, makes no sense and he clearly he has no idea what he's actually saying. But it's funny as fuck.
9.) Dolph is actually playing himself...just an FYI
10.) I mean Jean Villain just wants to be a rich as fuck motherfucker. At least he's only using men for the slave labor
11.) This is an actual line: "I have people who are willing to pay ten billion dollars for that plutonium in the mine. Three days." (really 10 billion dollars for plutonium? Couldn't you trick some Libyans by giving them pinball machine parts?)
12.) I'll admit, the Chuck Norris joke was funny.
13.) The Arnold/Bruce ambiguously alpha male duo was solid
14.) Stallone vs Van Damme: I counted 2 spinkicks from JCVD. Where was the Dim Mak? Make him say "matte" JCVD!
14a.) Every Stallone fight scene resembles the final scene from Demolition Man
15.) Van Damme kinda dies like a pussy
16.) Something guns, something punching, something pa pa pa power!
17.) The Couture ear jokes were corny
18.) Hot asian chick should have been played by Jamie Chung. Every hot asian chick should be played by Jamie Chung
19.) At least Statham got to throw some knives
20.) Next super team: Jackie Chan, Scott Speedman and Michael Dudikoff
With Comic Con over and this week being all about The Dark Knight Rises, I figure it was timely I share my first taste of pure, relentless fandom. No, it wasn't Star Wars, nor was it Reeve's Superman or Star Trek. My first real fandom craze was for Tim Burton's 1989 blockbuster. I'm not sure there is any YouTube clips of what it was like back in that summer of 1989. Batman was released on June 23rd. I was just under PG-13 and me and my friends were mega excited. We all had watched the campy 60s version but seeing trailers for this darker, spookier version got us all hyped.
I know I saw it at least 3 times.
I remember my friend hyping up the Batmobile (he of course was on his 2nd viewing). And the moment Batman says "Shields" I go ape shit.
When Batman goes "I'm Batman". I go gorilla shit.
When Batman goes nuts in Axis Chemical, it was freakin awesome.
Don't get me wrong, Nicholson's Joker was a sight of pure madness and evil genius. She steals the show.
I start falling in love with Kim Basinger realizing that I can see her boobies in 9 1/2 Weeks years later.
We all bought Batman shirts. We all had Batman sneakers. If you didn't have a Batman t-shirt, something was definitely wrong with you. That summer in 1989 was all Batman all the time. We started making our own utility belts. Basements became Bat caves.
Don't get me started with Michelle Pfieffer in her latex suit in Returns.
There is a part of me that never left that summer. Now every time I see a big summer blockbuster, I want to get that feeling back. The sense of kid wonder, a movie that made me love comic books. My first comic book infatuation was Spiderman. I was a Marvel kid and made sure I had my own "bag" in my comic book store. "Bags" was a sort of comic book store layaway program. They'd save the latest issues for you and you paid for what you could afford.
But my heart fell in love with DC when Batman came out. I got a copy of The Dark Knight Returns and Frank Miller blew me away with his story and the art work was awesome. Full page shots of a old, muscled up Batman. If you haven't read this, you're not a real Batman fan.
But Burton's Batman is where my fandom started. Kids bought the Batman toys, the cowls, the capes, the games, the everything. (Batman the game was nightmare of mega proportions). I wore a Batman costume for Halloween 3 consecutive years. I wish there was a record of that summer but the videos below give a certain glimpse of the hysteria.
Roger Ebert doesn't like Batman but Siskel loves it.
The VHS version of Batman arrived 4 months after release of the movie which was unprecedented at the time. Check out this news report.
Were you part of the Batman craze in the Summer of 89? Do you remember what Batman hysteria was like that year? Share your thoughts!
After watching the umpteenth trailer and clips of The Raid: Redemption, you just get the feeling this shits going to be fuckin awesome. Sure we can all get hyped by The Expendables 2, but I get the eerie feeling Gareth Evans Indonesian action flick is going to get rewashed, rebooted and remade in that repackaged American way.
Haven't seen the trailer? Check it out.
Remember when Ong Bak came out and it fuckin exploded in your brain? I think Thailand may get dethroned by Indonesian's action stunt teams. I mean look at these scene below. Holy fuckin cow.
There is nothing like seeing some dude gets his head blown up point blank. Plus there a few more scenes of just pure WTF. "Silat", the Indonesian martial arts style seems like it's replacing muy thai for pure action awesomness.
My friends who know me, know I'm a stickler to see original flicks before the remakes. I'm pretty sure they got The Rock and Will Smith lined up for some pussy PG-13 American bullshit. Sorry Tony Jaa, your ass got replaced.
Is The Raid going to revolutionize the action film? What do you think?
During Hurricane Irene, I bummed around the web looking for inspiration for a new feature. Shit, I had a few hours to burn before the hurricane-apocalypse (which turned out to be a dud). Remembering old conversations Insano Steve and I had and giving a quick glimpse of Arnold Schwarzenegger's filmography, one can find many instances where Arnold's films tend to blend together. [light bulb appears over head!]
Sure Arnold has made a ton of film series (The Terminator trilogy and the Conan series) but if you really think about it, some of his films are unintentionally connected. Sure I've made Arnold lists in the past (see Top 10 Villains from Arnold Schwarzenegger Movies) but bear with me as I try to connect 3 pairs of Arnold flicks and explain how they fit together.
3.) The 6th Day/The Running Man
How are they connected?The Running Man is a sequel to The 6th Day
Explain that shit: The 6th Day takes place in 2015 and if you've seen it, it's about a man named Adam Gibson who finds out somebody has cloned him and the clone has infiltrated his job and family. Gibson with the help of his clone obliterates the mad scientist and his goons and the Gibson clone decides to go out on his own to Argentina to start another branch of the charter helicopter business.
But what if the clone decided not to go to Argentina?
The Running Man is actually the Gibson clone (he's changed his name to Ben Richards because he doesn't want to be known as Gibson 2.0) and his adventures on a reality show gone amok. Oddly enough it takes place in 2017 and Richards is an ex Military pilot (ahem ahem). The two worlds are eerily similar with mad game shows, cloned pet commercials and violent football games.
Surely this can't be a coincidence right?
2.) True Lies/Eraser
How are they connected?True Lies is a sequel to Eraser
Explain that shit: Eraser was about a US Marshal (John Kruger) who "erases" the identity of a corporate whistle blower but ends up protecting her from the evil James Caan. It's clear Mr. Kruger does his job well and deserves a promotion. He's good with secrets, coming up with multiple identities for himself and his clients. So isn't it likely he got promoted because of his awesome reputation to The Omega Sector, a US terrorism task force.
True Lies continues the adventures of "The Eraser" as he uses his expert erasing skills to change John Kruger to Harry Tasker, international man of mystery. It's clearly in the same universe and not out of the realm of possibility that The Eraser erased his own identity to lead a double life.
1.) Commando/Predator
How are they connected? Commando is the sequel to Predator
Explain that shit:Insano Steve initially came up with this one and it's kinda fuckin scary how it could work. Dutch is the leader of an elite military special forces group and well yada yada yada... you know the rest. Everybody gets killed, the predator blows himself up and Arnold escapes from the island.
It's pretty traumatizing for our boy Dutch. Your best friends have been killed, you've encountered an alien life form and you barely survived. Clearly, you would want to tell people about your story about how the men under your command performed bravely against an extraterrestrial.
But the military decides to force you to retire and keep quiet about the aliens in Guatemala so you build a life, bang a Norwegian hooker, have a daughter and end up changing your name to John Matrix. I always thought Bennet killed Matrix's wife. In any case John and Jenny Matrix will live happily ever after...that is until General Kirby fuckin shows up.
That's when you start leaving bodies piled up and killing entire armies.
Somehow everything catches up to our boy Dutch/Matrix. Still suffering from post traumatic alien disorder, Dutch/Matrix deals with it the only way he knows how: obliterating Val Verde from top to bottom.
Can you think of any other connections in Arnold flicks? I've been thinking Kindergarten Cop is a prequel to End of Days (Lovable John Kimble has a tumor, quits the police force and battles Satan) but that might be stretching it a bit.
Are there any other films you know of that might be unintentional sequels or prequels to each other? Sound off fellow jaded viewers.
I asked you all who should be in the Action Hall of Fame and you left some great comments. I got some great feedback and a few others chimed in via the poll and comments.
Jackie Chan is your winner! As you can see in the poll below he garnered 51 out of 182 votes.
Coming in second was my man Jean Claude Van Damme followed by Jason Statham in 3rd. Jackie Chan is most deserving to be in the Hall with the likes of Schwarenegger, Willis and Stallone. His action resume is freakin stellar on both sides of the ocean.
I got some great comments on why Jackie Chan came in first. See below.
Alyssa wrote:
"Jackie Chan is the shit.. no one compares, and he is an amaizing person who made worldwide people entertained with his sick ass moves!"
JustinH wrote:
"jackie chan without a doubt, forget his american movies, what he has done for world cinema throughout the late 70's until now has been incredible. The amount of pain doing them death defying stunts and brilliant fight choreography are untouched. Also he's a director,producer,writer,stunt chor,fight chor,singer,editor, everything. he is the ultimate action hero."
Rabid Fox wrote:
"Begrudgingly, I must tip my hat to Jackie Chan. I enjoy so few of his movies, but there's no doubt that the guy's filmography is prolific. And the guy does so many of his own stunts, I have found the end credits to his movies where they show the mishaps of stunt work to be more enjoyable than the actual film."
Thanks to all who voted and I'll be coming up with a new poll soon!
After watching The Expendables, I was disappointed in the fact that assembling a bunch of heavy duty action stars didn't just equal super uber awesomeness. We saw the "Big Three" in one scene for the first time. It's a given if there was an Action Star Hall of Fame, these 3 names would be the first ones inducted.
Arnold Schwarenegger, Sylvester Stallone and Bruce Willis have the stats, cred and films to make their induction a foregone conclusion. I'd even throw in posthumously Bruce Lee and maybe even Chuck Norris and Jet Li in there.
But as of today, who else could get the votes to join these guys?
Well, I'm going to put a poll in the right nav bar with the nominees below. You can go ahead and vote who you think should be in the HOF. But first here are 4 that can make a case for getting in.
I know there are probably some write in votes, so if you have somebody in mind leave em in the comments. Also, I'm not forgetting about our favorite action heroines. We'll get to that one at a later date.
1.) Jean Claude Van Damme
Why he should get in: Bloodsport is the pinnacle of full contact tournament movies. Throw in Univeral Soldier and one of my hidden gems Lionheart and he has a resume of uber action.
Best Movie: Bloodsport
Why he should NOT get in: Early success led to a later straight to dvd crapfest. Van Damme's insistence on "character action" has led to most of his movies ending up in the dollar bin and an absence from any American theatrical releases.
2.) Steven Seagal
Why he should get in: Seagal's 90s movies were "I beat em up and I don't even get hurt at all" slaughterfests. An American turned Japanese who seemed to create a new kind of action hero. He's stayed relevant with a few name flicks with the last being Machete.
Best Movie: Under Siege
Why he should NOT get in: Seagal also ended up in the dollar bin with bad straight to dvd snoozefests. Action stars usually get beaten up and redeem themselves at the end. Seagal never ever got a scratch on him. Where's the action in that?
3.) Will Smith
Why he should get in: The Fresh Prince is the most bankable Hollywood action star. His movies gross obscene amounts of money, he's got the humor, the brawn and the kick ass attitude.
Best Movie: Independence Day
Why he should NOT get in: He's tried to move away from the action cinema and gone towards more dramatic roles. His action resume is shorter than the others on this list.
4.) Jackie Chan
Why he should get in: He made the kung fu/comedy action movie popular again and took action scenes to another level. Nobody can duplicate these scenes of insane martial arts with funny ha ha's. Chan's action resume is insane.
Best Movie: Police Story
Why he should NOT get in: His first stint into American action cinema didn't go well and his latest movies have lacked the "oooomphh" of his early work. Those Rush Hour movies were kinda ugh no?
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OK, now it's your turn. I know you have others you want to nominate and you should. So go ahead and chime in. Who else should be on this list?
Now out of these random 4 action stars, who DESERVES to be in the Action Hero Hall of Fame with the other 3??? Oh BTW, explain why they should be in there.
The super team concept is nothing new. Let's pile on the stars and blow shit up. Ensemble casting works and with the action movie as low as its been in years, you need the star power to get people into the theaters.
Oddly, as I was watching this I kept thinking how The Expendables can be compared to the Miami Heat. Stallone is Wade, Lebron is Jason Statham and Bosh is Jet Li. All sacrificed their egos at the door to make one blockbuster movie. Did you think anybody from the team was going to die? Hahaha...seriously right? Fuck no. They're all badasses. Terry Crews and Coutoure are the non mega stars but no way were they gonna die.
I mean even the bad apple (Dolph) survived. So we can say the Miami Heat are the super friends coming together to destroy every team in the NBA. But the big question for the Heat is will everybody be happy with less points and being "The Man" on his team for the sake of a championship? Nobody knows for sure but when I watched The Expendables, the screen time was sacrificed by all.
Here's what I noticed:
Stallone kicks ass but doesn't have the awesome murder death kills he usually has
Statham steals the show here (knife throwing plus gun play) and that basketball scene making him the "true star" of The Expendables
Jet Li gets some token screen time via Dolph
I was so hyped to see all these mega stars together that when they were 187-ing the Val Verde (or whatever that country was called) army I was a little underwhelmed. Sure it was fun but too much star power I think was overkill.
Let's explore this further with a WTF List.
1.) Do you really need to send in The Expendables when you gotta kill Somali pirates? I think the Navy did a good job on this. 2.) HOLY FUCKIN COW! The uber mega scene between Stallone, Willis and Schwarenegger was every fan boys dream come true.
(sidenote: I think Arnold's character of Trench is really Dutch (from Predator) who in reality is really Matrix (from Commando))
3.) The Expendables are such a goofy crew when you break them down racially: You got a big roided up American, a British guy, a Chinese guy, a pa pa powerful black dude, a Swedish guy and a fucked up ear guy. 4.) They are taking on a former CIA agent white guy, Stone Cold and an entire South American Army 5.) Seriously, Matrix could have easily wiped out the army of Vilena in 20 minutes (see Val Verde) 6.) The knife throwing Lee Christmas should have his own movie 7.) The car chase scene to the airplane was really lame....right? Though it led to mega 'splosions 8.) I like how Stallone wrote up a scene for Statham (basketball scene) and for Li (vs Dolph). Cmon, we would have loved seeing Jet Li wipe out an entire platoon by himself 9.) I have the exact number of explosives they planted. It was 1,947. 10.) That Vilena girl wasn't even that hot. Couldn't they get Zoe Saldana? She will act for food. 11.) These island nations should really not accept a shady ex CIA agent's help. 12.) Pa pa pa pa POWER!!!! (in other words Terry Crews can blow up lookout towers looking cool) 13.) OMG, was that an action montage within another action montage within another action montage???!?!??!? 14.) I think I counted 4 wrestling moves, 3 MMA moves and 89 martial arts moves. 15.) Stone Cold acting tough is such a stretch 16.) I feel for the henchmen army. All they wanted to do was support their families by earning meager paychecks from the government. Now all of them are dead, dismembered or highly unconscious 17.) And why was Mickey Rourke in this? 18.) Technically, Stone Cold fucked up Stallone 19.) I appreciate a good decapitation 20.) So all I need is 5 million dollars to hire The Expendables? Do you guys do birthday parties?
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Sure its filled with action cliches and alpha male bravado but its still a solid flick. Each of the "big 3" could have had more screen time and I kinda felt too much stuff was going on at once. The CGI blood and explosions were aggravating to watch but who I to complain as Stallone did it in Rambo.
The Expendables is a very movable objects meeting an unstoppable force. It's an entertaining movie but a bit boring. Here goes my last NBA analogy. Would I rather see the Heat destroy the Clippers by 50 or see Kevin Durant and the Thunder plays a close game as he hits the game winner.
I'm picking the latter. Now where's my Crank 3 Jason Statham???
In the sweltering heat, what better way to get cool by watching the action summer movies. As we get into action-palooza, I figure I'd get in the mood by watching Predators. I wasn't expecting much but 64% fresh on Rotten Tomatoes convinced me to give it a try. So let's head over to the game preserve with a WTF list.
1.) They're not even fuckin around, drop em in and lets get slaughtering 2.) Adrien Brody makes artsy fartsy movies doesn't he? 3.) Danny fuckin Trejo is a Mexican enforcer? This is like a totally new role he's never had to play before 4.) OK so we got a Ruskie, a Yakuza, an ex Con, token blood diamond slavemaster, Israeli sniper hottie, Eric from That 70s Show and Brody. Odds token black guy dies first. 2:1. 5.) Predators dogs are like Star Wars reject pets 6.) Predator vision has not improved since the 80s. 7.) Gratuitous reference to Ah-nuhld! You'd think the Predators would want revenge on Dutch and transport him to the preserve. 8.) It's not a Predators movie without a guy with a mini-gun. 9.) Jeezus. Topher Grace is one whiny bitch. 10.) OMG! Is that other alien target Species 8472?!? 11.) Hello crazy Laurence Fisburne 12.) Goodbye crazy Laurence Fisburne 13.) Original Predator vs Uber Predator. It's not as climactic as I was hoping. 14.) That twist was lame . 15.) Yakuza vs Predator! Awesome! This is the best scene in the entire movie. 16.) Dude. Is that CGI on Adrien Brody body? 17.) Well looky here, he went all Dutch. 18.) None of the characters are that memorable as in the original and there aren't as many memorable lines. 19.) Seriously...how would Brody know how to fly a Predators ship if he was able to hijack one??? 20.) If we had to tally Predators vs Human matchups, it would look something like this: Predators: 30,492 Humans: 3
All in all, Predators was a decent action movie that let me cool off for a few hours. It's hard to live up to the original and even Danny Glover's drive by Predator 2 is good to watch on TBS from time to time. Only time will tell if Predators will rounds out this trilogy for the better.
The latest Machete trailer came out today and it looks badass. In the battle of alpha male minds everywhere, we are going into full action porn mode when Machete will battle it out with The Expendables in a month or so.
These 2 mega giant rock em sock em movies won't go head to head. Mind you The Expendables comes out August 13th during peak summer movie time while Machete comes out September 3rd. But they are 2 of the biggest action flicks to come out this year.
So who has the edge? Let's break it down star by star and X Factors.
1.) Stallone vs Trejo Edge: Stallone Stallone is an icon and he can't be denied his legendary status. He has single handily kept the action movie alive by reincarnating his iconic characters Rocky and Rambo. Trejo has always been "That Guy" in movies but he's as badass as they come. I'm going with Stallone.
2.) Rodriguez/Alba vs Statham/Li Edge: Rodriguez/Alba
As much as I bow down to the greatness of Jason Statham and Jet Li, you can't argue seeing Jessica Alba and Michelle Rodriguez in scantily clad tight leather shoot heavy artillery and blowing shit up as not being totally fuckin awesome. They're hot and they're kicking ass for Machete. Statham and Li can helm their own action franchises but seeing Rodriguez and Alba is enough to put them over the top. Yummy.
3.) Seagal vs Lundgren Edge: Seagal
Sorry Dolph fans, but the pseudo Japanese Westerner gets the edge here because Seagal brings in the I'm overweight but I can use a Katana like no other mofo. Both are has been 80s stars but Seagal seems to get the slight edge as we last saw Lundgren with JCVD. Now if JCVD was in The Expendables, that would be a different story. 4.) Lindsay Lohan vs Terry Crews Edge: Crews
In a few incoherent words....PA PA PA PA POWER!!!
5.) Marin vs Austin/Couture Edge: Marin
Cheech Marin plays a priest turned killer. Plus if he says titty twister, I'm sold. It'll be interesting to see a wrestler and a MMA guy join the crew but Cheech is Cheech and he is fuckin hilarious.
6.) Don Johnson vs Eric Roberts Edge: Johnson
Sure Eric Roberts was decent in the Dark Knight but seeing Don Johnson might be awesome for shits and giggles. Both were 80s stars and both are now way off the radar and will act for food. I hope they both die in their respective films.
7.) Robert DeNiro vs Mickey Rourke Edge: Rourke
The battle of Oscar winners will bring class to both flicks but I have to with Rourke here based on the fact that somehow Mickey will totally overact in The Expendables somehow. It's too easy to have DeNiro play a corrupt Senator, shit I don't even know what Rourke's role is but my money is on demolition expert.
8.) Gratuitous Cameo Battle: McGowan/Savini vs Schwarzenegger/Willis Edge: Schwarenegger/Willis I love Rose McGowan and would automatically default to giving her the edge. It helps that we'll get to see Tom Savini as well in Machete. But c'mon now, Ah-nuld and John fuckin McClaine are cameo-ing in a Stallone flick and that is unprecedented. Without a doubt the cameo battle is won by these 2 legendary kings of action. 9.) Who will have more EXPLOSIONS? Edge: The Expendables
Duh.
10.) Who will have more MACHETES? Edge: Machete
Double Duh.
So after tallying everything up we've got:
The Expendables: 5
Machete: 5
It's a TIE!!
I can't deny I'm salivating for both movies. I really don't know which one is going to be better. But maybe you guys do. Which movie do you think will make you punch your fist through a wall?
Over at Lurple, I read a review of a film called Tiger Heart (a cheesy 80s nerd knows martial arts movie) and it got me thinking about the hilarity and absurdity that is Gymkata.
I haven't seen Gymkata in years. I actually don't even remember much about the plot, or the actors or the ending.
But I do remember THAT SCENE.
You know the one.
A bunch of baddies, a champion American gymnast turned government operative and....a pommel horse.
This is a 80s cult classic at its finest.
Check out the trailer.
And the infamous pommel horse fight scene.
You gotta love the dismount kicks. 10.0!!!! Gold Medal!!!
What are the top 10 scenes in Bloodsport? Well there are so many to choose from but we here at the jadedviewer have narrowed it down. I had to make some tough choices and cut it down to ten. Some notable exclusions are the opening montage scene, a couple of the mega fights (yes I know, I've got no Paco or E.Honda fights listed) and some memortable Dux moments ("you might wanna have kids one day" SPLIT).
Not everything can be put in but these 10 are the most awesome. 10 scenes. 10 classic moments.
So on to the list Shingo!
#10 "OK USA!"
Why it kicks ass: Big goofy Chinese guy's line as he brings Dux and Jackson to the so called underground tournament is classic broken english.
#9 "That's why they call this thing Bloodsport kid."
Why it kicks ass: The opening fight establishes the Kumite as some serious hardcore human cock fighting. Kudos to the janitor getting a gold tooth as he cleans up the blood on the mat hence the line.
#8 "Yeah Franky!!! Yeah!!!" Why it kicks ass: If this was a seeded tournament, Ray Jackson would be a solid #12 seed. But he easily disposes of his 1st opponent with a severe smash to the head then taunts Chong Li (bad move Ray). I mean how the hell did Ray Jackson get invited to the Kumite?
#7 "He's the American shithead that makes tricks with bricks"
Why it kicks ass: Hossein thinks he's so fuckin cocky trying to slap Janice and shit. But can Dux grab a coin from him before he closes his hand. Fuck no! Fun note: Dux learns this trick from the fish in the pond training during the Tanaka montage.
#6 "I'll be in the airport in 2 days"
Why it kicks ass: Dux gets chased by Forest Whitaker and the other guy through boats all over Hong Kong in that cheesy 80's montage sort of way. The hilarious kicker at the end is classic.
#5 "Aren't you a little old for video games?" Why it kick ass: It's Karate Champ! This goofy exchange between Dux and Jackson makes for a some classic trash talk. Awesome use of a 80s video game for foreshadowing!
#4 "You are not Japanese! You are NOT Tanaka!"
Why it kicks ass: It's an opening training montage! That's why. Whats more 80s than that?
#3 "Say It!!! Say It!!!!"
Why it kicks ass: Fuji dust, the referee jump kick, the 6 spinkicks, the Dux groan plus flashbacks!, Uncle. Nuff said.
#2 "Chong Li! Chong Li! Chong Li!"
Why it kicks ass: Chong Li becomes the unstoppable, ultimate evil when he kills his opponent and disrespects the Kokoruki elders. You so bad ass Chong Li!
#1 "Show us the Dim Mak"
Why it kicks ass: I mean c'mon now. This is the pinnacle of the movie. The judge asks for the "bottom one" and Dux obliges. When have you EVER seen somebody smash a brick with their focused energy?? Of course the Dim Mak later failed against E. Honda's chubby fat ass, but hey at least the Dim Mak got Dux into the tournament right?
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